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I know This May Sound Strange But............

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Posted 4/18/2011 2:01 PM (GMT 0)
Sometimes when I am feeling calm and peaceful with myself and the world around me, I almost do not know how to handle it.  It has been so long since I was a relaxed person that when I am sometimes it feels strange.  I have been so ill for so long and the last few months have been great in comparison.

Has anyone ever experienced this?  It is like I need to re-learn being in my own skin.

Can anyone relate?

Gem

Posted 4/18/2011 2:20 PM (GMT 0)
i can relate gem. chaos has become my norm. i get lost and somewhat lonely in quiet and serene moments. working on this myself. keep well, breathe and know that your safe in these nice periods. when i get somewhat stilled i get busy, the quiteness actually aides my mind and shifts it from thinking and roominating. with compassion, jamie. thx 4 sharing that.
Posted 4/18/2011 2:50 PM (GMT 0)
Gem,

I understand the feeling and I am waiting for some calmness and peace in my world right now. 

Enjoy your feelings  and try not to overthink things.  You deserve some peace so know this is your time to just feel good. You have found your  calm center and are reclaiming  your life. ... Whatever you are doing Gem, it is working for you.

I admire you for working so hard at finding some peace.  Blessings to you.

With Gentle Hugs,

Kitt

 

Posted 4/18/2011 3:36 PM (GMT 0)
Not strange at all! I've been dealing with this confusion for a while now...been sick for too long that I feel uncomfortable feeling "calmness" and "peace" around me. I even feel bad when I have feelings of happiness. Strange and sad...indeed. I wish I could feel more happiness and allow myself to accept whatever joy I am experiencing.
Posted 4/18/2011 10:52 PM (GMT 0)
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy it, it feels wonderful, just so surreal. Glad to know I am not the only one. I hope we all continue to feel these moments and that they last longer and longer.

Not being able to take meds, I have to work really, really hard. Sometimes it is exhausting and I just want to stop, but I know I cannot. So, tomorrow morning at about 5:30 a.m. when everyone is warm and snug in their beds, I will be running. When I run I am free of all that weighs me down. When I run all my mind can think about is the next step, then the next. When I run all I can do is breathe. When I run sometimes I cry. When I run.....................

Gem
Posted 4/20/2011 9:03 AM (GMT 0)
i cry in my calmness too. it is cleansing. #hugs# jamie
Posted 4/20/2011 2:34 PM (GMT 0)

 

Precious Gem said...
Don't get me wrong, I enjoy it, it feels wonderful, just so surreal. Glad to know I am not the only one. I hope we all continue to feel these moments and that they last longer and longer.

 

I don't understand. So you feel it, and allow yourself to feel it, but you're confused because it's a state you have not been in for a while? Is that right? In my case, I have a hard time allowing myself to even experience these feelings. I've had them..but something stops me. I don't get it. I feel maybe I don't deserve this good feeling...or perhaps I've been dealing with the negative feelings so long...I'm afraid to experience feelings of happiness? Or maybe it's a defense mechanism...

Posted 4/20/2011 2:49 PM (GMT 0)
Correct.  It has been a long time since I did not feel anxious 24/7, so not feeling that way is wonderful but feels so different.  I guess it is hard to explain to someone that really hasn't experienced it.  Think of it like someone who broke their arm or leg and it was in a cast for a really long time.  Eventually you get use to the cast even though you don't like it, but when the cast comes off, it feels good and strange at the same time.

You are deserving, until you think otherwise, I am afraid it will elude you.  We are all deserving of wellness.

Thanks for your post!

Gem

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