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what kind of personality disorder is this

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Posted 6/16/2011 5:49 PM (GMT 0)
For awhile now I've noticed that it makes me really angry when family memebers say to me"Your going to have to" or try to tell me when to do something.I don't know why I can't just let it bounce off of me.I don't do that to anyone else I don't expect them  to do it to me. I also can't stand "I'll tell you one thing...with a snicker". I used to be a people pleaser but lately its been going in the opposite direction.My therapist has told me to tell them politely to back off or to keep their minds on their own buisness,I have tried but it still happens over and over. Plus they want me to listen when they have a problem but tend to ignore me when I want to talk about something.
Posted 6/17/2011 1:34 AM (GMT 0)
It sounds like you have a lot of anger stored up and it is easily triggered by what others may say. 

No matter where we go, we will face people who are negative, people who oppose our ideas, people who piss us off or people who simply do not like us. There are 6.4 billion people out there and conflict is a fact of life. This fact isn’t the cause of conflict but it is the trigger to our emotions and our emotions are what drive us back to our most basic survival instinct; react and attack back to defend ourselves.

In these instinctual moments, we may lose track of our higher selves and become the human animal with an urge to protect ourselves when attacked. This too is natural. However, we are the only animal blessed with intelligence and having the ability to control our responses.  Tuned these people out or walk away.  You know you are a worthy person and you deserve love and respect.

Kindly,

Kitt

Posted 6/17/2011 2:14 AM (GMT 0)
 how do I teach my brain to ignore these staments when they are coming from loved ones.
Posted 6/17/2011 2:02 PM (GMT 0)
My therapist taught me a question to use when someone, anyone, says something hurtful or I perceive the comments as snide - 

Just calmly say, "What do you mean by that?"   It throws the whole issue back in the face of the person making the remark - or just walk away.  Do not let someone else take you down when you know you are fine.

You can also choose to eliminate negative people from your life,  yes even family members...............or at least distance yourself from these negative people. Negative people can be a source of energy drain. And deeply unhappy people will want to bring you down emotionally, so that they are not down there alone.

Take care and remember you must love yourself first !

Gentle Hugs,

Kitt

Posted 6/17/2011 8:57 PM (GMT 0)
thank you for the suggestions..I am just afraid that if I say what do you mean by that they will go into an hour long put down. You are probably right about some distance even if it's just my own space. I live with the ones who are doing it..really no where else to go...not able to work because of health problems.I am waiting to here from disability claim..
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