Panic attacks due to abusive boyfriend

Hi everyone, I don't know if most people may think I'm stupid because I'm so young but this is the ONLY place I have to turn to I'm so so lonely and I think I might be very depressed. I'll start with the whole story. I used to be a happy girl out every weekend with my friends without a care in the world then I met my boyfriend who I've now been with 2 years and 8months. It hasn't been a very good relationship from the start as he was 21 and I was 16 when we got together and he wanted to be very in control of me and very soon I stopped going out all together just to prevent him ruining my night. He would call me up to break up with me for no reason and now he can tell me its over if I do something as simple as make his breakfast wrong. A year ago he got his own council flat and he has been so so nasty. He has called me so many bad names he's told me I'm ugly he has me doing everything and anything i give him all my money because he needs it am he just spends it on stupid things, i bought him a iPhone last week and I'm using a 5pound phone. I have no friends because they think he's horrible. He's spat in my face he tells me he's only with me cos he feels sorry for me. Please help me I'm so lonely it hurts me so bad. Its destroying my family too because all I do is cry and I take everything out on my mum dad and sister. I don't know what i done wrong apart from being to nice. I recently started having panic attacks its got that's bad he just laughs an calls my mum or dad to get me he doesn't even care that he's making me have them help me what can I do? I've lost jobs and been kicked out of college because he will just cllbme up screaming telling me to get to his flat an get all my stuff out of there. Mostly for no reason. U probably think he's not tha bad but he is I just am stuck in love with him an need help. I just want him to care about me an not make me feel so low. I've got no one at all to speak to so someone here please please help me. Thank u so much xxx

Post Edited By Moderator (Scaredy Cat) : 5/11/2012 11:10:23 AM (GMT-6)

PLEASE get out of this relationship! It's not worth your health or your heart. I too went through the same thing, even at the same age... I didn't just get panick attacks, I got the panick attack disorder! I STILL have it 10 years later. Living your life on pills and still having to deal with the occasional panick attack anyways isn't worth it. Believe me! And that's just one part of this you'll have to deal with. Loosing who you once were, and feeling like your not good enough for anybody are other things that you'll get from this relationship. Not only that, but you'll learn this behavior and keep finding guys that will treat you this way through out life. Please try to go to therapy if nothing else. I thought I would be able to deal with it on my own, and ended up more screwed up and having to go to therapy at 29 because of it. You need help. Just you. Weather it to be done with the relationship, or even to learn how to live in your own skin again. This is NOT love. Love can hurt, but it shouldn't be fearful and this unpredictable. You can do this :) You'll thank youself later

Your in my thoughts

thank you all so much it really means so much to me! Every comment really really helps and I thank u with all my heart! Please is there anyway anyone can have a one on one chat with me Ami can explain everything and take some advice. I havnt really got a support system my family are just worried I don't wanna worry them more. Please you could really make a big difference. Thank you xxx