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Trying to get panic and anxiety under control

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Posted 10/16/2012 3:57 AM (GMT 0)
I am getting help for my anxiety and have really been working hard to get it back under control. I have completely stopped drinking anything with caffeine, I have stopped using alcohol, and I have been practicing distracting myself from thoughts that trigger anxiety. This week has been very bad. I have been keeping track of different thoughts Ive had that trigger an anxiety attack. They vary, but a common one is fear of my gf cheating or our relationship ending. This thought has been bothering me and making anxiety very bad. Weve been dating for 6 months, she has given me zero reason to think thats actually happening. We were even apart over the summer and i was not worried about it at all. she actually helps me and is very supportive when i am nervous or depressed. i have never told her about that worry though. all it took was someone to mention their friends gf cheating and that got my thoughts going. This is just one example of a thought that has been giving me trouble. I worry a lot about my relationship, school, work, the sports club that I am in, and i just wanna be able to relax, learn, and get my life back under my control. I am seeing a doctor and am getting help that is necessary in beating this, but there are many days when i am almost brought to tears in a panic attack. is there anything else i can be doing or can someone offer any other advice? I am really working hard to get my life back to normal. Thank you for reading.
Posted 10/16/2012 4:33 AM (GMT 0)
Hi n.a.e.

You are doing all the right things and taking the necessary steps to treat your anxiety...so it will get better, it just takes time.

Anxiety can cause us to have irrational thoughts that plague us. Even if we know that the thought is not likely to happen, it can still bother us. That is why speaking positively to ourselves helps...it reprograms the thought processes away from negative and anxious areas.

The next time you have a worriesome thought about your gf cheating for example...repeat three things that you know are true and good about her. Example: My gf has given me every reason to trust her...I know that she loves me...and she is a person I can depend on.

You may also want to repeat to yourself:

'These thoughts and worries are coming from anxiety, not reality.'

Have you also tried breathing and relaxation exercises for those times when you are feeling panicky? We have some examples (links to videos) in our Resources if you would like to check some out. Practicing these daily can really bring over-all stress levels down, thus reducing P/A's!

I hope that you will start to feel better soon. Keep posting with us...we are here to listen and support you along this journey.

Talk with you soon,

S.C.
Posted 10/16/2012 1:06 PM (GMT 0)
Have you tried Cranio-sacral treatment? Comes under the heading of massage, but it is different. It is light touch, you leave your clothes on and there is a wonderful sense of relaxation that you can' t get with anything else. It can, if you have an experienced therapist, get to the bottom of your anxiety.
Posted 10/16/2012 1:13 PM (GMT 0)
Hey n.a.e.,

Sorry to read that you're not feeling well. You have to accept that a lot of things are just not under your control, and that its fine that way. If you could dictate your gf's every move, that wouldn't make you happy either. The worst thing for a relationship is mistrust. When one party does not trust the other fully, then the very foundation of your relationship is rotten and it won't last. Also, thoughts like these can act as a sort of self fulfilling prophecy: you worry about her cheating, she senses your insecurity, this drives her away. Don't be that guy. Let her feel that you trust her. I'm not saying you should let your  guard down completely: anyone in a relationship should keep his/her eyes open. But theres a difference between being careful about getting burned and killing the fire just to make sure.

I'd stay away from the caffeïne, if i were you. Stuff is toxic to the mind.

Cheers,

Max

 

Posted 10/17/2012 3:31 AM (GMT 0)
I have never heard of the cranio sacral treatment, but ill look into it for sure. I cant stand being nervous like this anymore and having stupid thoughts for no reason. I wanna get better and I am doing everything possible to do so. Max I totally agree about caffeine, I have not had a caffinated beverage in a few weeks now.

I dont know the root of my anxiety because it stems from so many different things and if im not worried about one trigger, i find another. I held off 2 panic attacks today with deep breathing exercises. With the whole cheating thing though, I know that mistrust can destroy a relationship and I truly do trust her. She is an amazing woman who is super understanding of my anxiety and Im sure that if i explained it to her she would be understanding. No matter what I would never do anything to be controlling. she is her own person and has her own life. i would never make her sacrifice time w/ her friends or anything for me. I have kept my word there and make sure that I do. I have a friend who has a controlling boyfriend and it makes me sick. I could never do that...
I write this on here and i know i can talk to her about anything, but I dont wanna bring this worry up to her. Im sure she would be reassuring, but I just get afraid I annoy her with all my stupid worries.

I also just feel like thats another thing I worry about thats out of my control and i wanna know how to stop that worry before it starts affecting things. The one thing that does make it subside is remember that she told me she wont cheat and would never hurt me like that because it happened to her. but the thought just keeps popping up.

I know I answer my own questions sometimes, but I guess reading the posts and writing out my thoughts kinda helps me have some realizations. Thank you all for your insight and for listening to me. any feedback is read and appreciated. I have to get through this and learn how to control my anxiety and not let it control me.
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