Not Panic. Anxiety: I'm learning so much

I decided to go talk to a counselor about my symptoms and experiences and I'm happy I did it.

I initially thought it was Panic but that it was really really really mild, not at all what I knew panic to be. She stated that she didn't think it was panic either, that it was more along the lines of general anxiety, but she didn't want to call it a "disorder" yet.

I remember at one point she had asked how long the symptoms lasted and I didn't know so I tried to track them. about once or twice a day for about 5 minutes. Outside of that I tend to get muscle aches and tension, and headaches. I didn't know general anxiety had those symptoms and thought that all symptoms of that nature were Panic...even though the term didn't seem to apply to me.

We talked...this was probably my most productive conversation in a long time. She explained that my anxiety was a result of things I had buried under the surface bubbling up and in the form of this reaction. That opened a can of worms. I wish I had more time to talk to her about my feelings at that very moment, about how I hated my university and felt stifled, like in order to cope I had to bury my feelings and detach from the reality of the experience, or that I became very unassuming as a way to stop myself from feeling the trauma of taking initiative and being disappointed again and again. But I'll tell her more next week. This week was about exploring my relationship with my family. I left the session feeling lighter.

Since that session, I've only had one reaction and i feel like the symptoms of headaches and fogginess are decreasing. Why? Because I'm finally talking about the feelings I had tried stifled these last 2 years to someone in person again and I'm not being shunned or denied of them. Yes, i still have muscle aches and I still feel the tension around my neck and shoulders but I feel lighter...sincerely so.

WEll because there's Panic Attacks/Disorder and then there's General Anxiety Disorder. And the two manifest in somewhat different ways.

I also wanted to add that depression is also often times linked to depression as they say it affects a similar chemical in the brain, but it doesn't necessarily have to be that way. Dopamine, epinephrine, GABA and serontonin are suspected to affect anxiety while serontonin, dopamine, and norepinephrine are said to affect depression. So you can probably see the link between the two with serontonin and dopamine.

But I'm not a doctor, only sharing what I learned in nursing school. Maybe as time goes on she'll subtly allude that I have depression (I don't feel like I do) but maybe she might perceive that I have depression or panic or...cyclothymia (don't feel like I do either). But I want to take this one day at a time and not get ahead of myself...

Post Edited (Soliloquy) : 10/25/2012 7:57:42 AM (GMT-6)

I too have been going to therapy just recently and leave with my head held high. I love it! Just talking with someone that has answers as to why I feel the way I do. I have let a lot off my shoulders and it feels awesome! Glad you like it as much as I do!

Thats too funny because today was only my second session as well :) We got to the root that "SYMPTOMS cause THOUGHTS" not "THOUGHTS cause SYMPTOMS!" I was so relieved to hear this because whenever I feel a symptom I get scared. Well people would be like "well what were you thinking about" and I really couldn't remember dwelling on anything and the symptom was still there. I have something to look forward too every week and even though I have a supporting husband and a close family there is some things I just can't tell them for fear they don't understand. (and I know they don't!) So I'm loving my experience so far. I feel we have gotten pretty deep already as well :)