Panic disorder, anexity, worry all the time.

I am 38 years old. Im a single mom of 5 kids. Let me tell you about myself. I married when I was 16. To I thought the love of my life. I did good for the first 10 years of marriage and then I started to wonder what was out there. ya know. I guess I married too young. Don't know. ANyways. I started to cheat on my husband. Only cheated once for a few years. Then I started to cheat all the time. I started having panic when I was pregnant with my 2nd child. I had agoraphobia for 2 years. I got better with meds after several years. I had two more kids. During this time I was still married and still having extra marriage affairs. It was like I couldn't stop. I think I liked the attention. I hurt my husband so bad so many time. we divorced a couple of years ago. I met this man that charmed me and I thought hung the moon. I got pregnant with my 5th child. Later to find out he was a drug addict and he abused me. I felt like I deserved to be abused because of all the bad I have done in my life. about a couple of months after having my baby I started having panic attacks again. Bad. Worse than ever. I was working 40 hours a week. Trying to take care of 5 kids and dealing with him constantly downing me and harrassing me. I finally got rid of him. Thank God. But, I have had such a hard time getting this panic and crazy thoughts under control. I went through a period where I didn't want to be alone with my baby. I felt like such a horrible mother. I love her so much. I love all my kids. I felt like I was going crazy. Im a little better now but I worry constantly. Im unable to work or drive. Im scared to home alone. I live with my parents because I feel they will take care of me. I worry all the time Im going crazy. Any advice. Please someone tell me they have experienced this before.

Hi SBE and welcome!

You have been given some excellent advice by G.P. This is a great place for support and ideas on how to cope. We all share similar struggles, so please feel welcomed and encouraged here!

Thank you for sharing your story. You certailnly have been through a lot of things emotionally, as well as having a tough and wonderful job as a mother...and of course trying to deal with anxiety and panic...it all adds up to a lot to deal with!

That is where the advice by G.P. comes in. Relaxation and breathing exercises can help you to feel better, and you can start today! In our Resources (main page, 1st post) there are links that teach these. Give them a try consistently a couple of times everday and see how you feel.

You may also want to consult with your doctor about other treatments that he/she can help you with. Therapy and or medication are two options that can be discussed. You mentioned that you had tried meds? Are you still currently on anything? Have you tried therapy...or the combination of the two? I can highly recommend therapy! It helpe me to overcome my panic attacks and to manage my anxiety well.:)

Keep posting here with us as well. It is very helpful to talk with other who understand. We are here to listen and support.:)

Scaredy Cat