I feel hopeless and completely crazy

Today is another day of feeling completely overwhelmed by worry and angry because of it.  I had a kidney stone taken out by surgery on the 5th of September, got a septic kidney infection a week later and spent a week in the hospital.  The calmest I've felt in five years was those days spent in the hospital because I knew if anything went wrong, I was right there where they could "save" me.  I've felt a constant urge to pee for the year I waited for the stone to pass, and hoped surgery would help, but I still feel like I have to pee all the time.  This has sent me into a spiral of obsessive worrying.  Bladder cancer was ruled out, due to several ct scans, and the surgery itself, where they can see the inside of the bladder.  I even went to the gynecologist to have a checkup yesterday so I can rule out uterine/cervical cancer.  I still am obsessing over ovarian cancer, and all I can think about is how bad I want a scan to rule that out, or an ultrasound.  I always feel that I don't push doctors enough and therefore will die because of a missed tumor of some kind.  I've been positive that I've had leukemia, lymphoma, you name it.  (minus the types only men can get, lol)  Now I have to wait for the results of the tests from yesterday, and feel absolutely nauseous with worry.  Sometimes I can function during the day, and then it hits me like a truck and all I can do is freak out and try to stave off a complete nervous break down.  This is no way to live.  I have to have a job and do my work.  It's impossible sometimes to function at all because I just want to break down and lie in bed.  Why would you want to live a life worried about death everyday?  I don't notice the good things anymore.  I try to be positive and use positive self talk, but it gets exhausting talking myself out of crazy town on a daily basis.  What do any of you do to help on a bad day?  Or just any day?  I eat to make myself feel better, but now this is causing other problems.  Weight gain, cholesterol problems.  What to do?  I'm not married, don't have kids, but feel I'm missing out on so much because of this obsession.  There's no room in my life for anything but this anxiety. 

Thanks Kitt,
I feel awful complaining on here because everything I've worried about, someone on here has too. I've read a lot of posts on here, including some of yours and I'm so sorry for all of the troubles your having with your health as well. I can't imagine how bad the anxiety must get sometimes when going through treatments. I hope you get well as soon as possible, and get back to your life. Thank you for responding to my post and I will read through your link to the resources.
All the best,
Annie