Stressing

And I can feel it here lately being a heavy load I've been struggling lately with faith,and not just knowing God for my teaching but knowing God for myself but I must say Iam grateful for my teaching. It has been my food to survive and that alone lots me know there is a higher power watching out for me,because what some have up on I stay fighting through. Because I have a determination to see my greater&my better&those times I fill like pulling my hai out literally,Iam able to find my way through&when I make stupid mistakes God keeps on covering me&I can say with truth is the only one that never hurt me are misuse me in any kind of way and for that Iam grateful. Iam a good person&I show myself friendly why is it I don't have true loyal friends,today after one of my so call friends disrespected me on something she was wrong for. I realize I have no true friends&it is time for me to make a clean sweep of all the dead weight in my life,I have no more time for it&these are people I have gave a true chance to&been there faithfully to them and they add misery to my already full misery filled ups&downs.
For people to be so ignorant is just so stupid&to be rude&cruel to the next when they never know what a person is going through,is heartless&just thoughtless and ad I told my mother. I don't trust anybody not even family at times because they too a few of them have stuck a tool of their choice in my back,and been so cruel to bring me down when I had been already down ai just don't have time for it. Thank God for soul searching,for it has made me face some harsh realities like I will be single for a long time. Until God sends my soulmate one who will love,honor&cherish me and is a earthly protector that will protect me by all means necessary a real man&real true loyal friends who value friendship&its meaning¬ take for granted please keep me in your prayers.

Thank you&Iam giving my best.