Please...ADVICE! Creepy NEIGHBOUR!

Ok...so, my husband, son and I have been living in this apartment for about 3 months, with no neighbour. This 42 year old guy just moved in right next door yesterday. while I was going outside to do laundry, He was in the hallway moving boxes. I said, "Oh,are you our new neighbour? My name is Lisa, nice to meet you" and we shook hands. Well, about 20 minutes later, he came and rang my doorbell, and was like "Sorry i wanted to introduce myself again, and then I went and got my husband and told him to come meet him. Well this guy just LOOKS creepy first of all. Well, he came in and met my husband and 4 year old. This guy would not quit talking, he said this apartment is his "Second house" to "get away" and then he told us he does nails and he is a nail tech and he could do mine anytime for free. He said "even your husband could be there , i dont care" BY THE WAY, he had dark blue glittery nails with WHITE tips. He told us," Dont think im weird for doing nails. I still like women as much as you do (to my husband)" then he looked at my son...and he said "Oh yea, I definitely like to eat THAT..sorry im trying to keep it polite" so freaking weird!!! ok so then, he asked us if we were hungry. He said he made lunch and we couldc ome over and see it. So we went over there and he showed us this bowl of soup he made. It was hot, and he was like you can have some if you want? Also you can come over anytime, I cook everyday. We were like no thanks we arenthungry. Anyway, he came back like an hour later to our house and knocked on the door, then after 30 seconds rang the doorbell, and asked if he could have a ride to his other house to get a blanket. We said we dont have any gas (whichis true) and hes like oh i can give you money. I could even put gas from a gas can in your tank. Well we basically said no. Now, this afternoon i went out to do laundry at the apartment across the road (because we live in an apartment complex) and as soon as i walked out side I heard him look through his blinds. I glanced behind me and sure enough he was peeking at me through his blinds. I got all the way over to the other apartment (afterlike 20 seconds) and he was still peeking at me. I went in, put laundry in the washer, came back out and the blinds were open this time. Only one window was open. The other blinds were shut. So i think he noticed that i saw him creeping and opened his blinds completelyto make it look like he wasnt. PLEASE I need some advice on this, my husband even thinks it is so weird and we are tempted to call our landlord Monday. Technically he hasnt done anything but its still weird... I dont know what to do! ANY ADVICE?

Post Edited (MasonsMommy07) : 3/8/2014 2:12:45 PM (GMT-7)

Merrida, when he was saying "he likes to eat that" He was being sexual. (about women) It bothered me... It's not a good first impression at all, he was a little too blunt.

And I can understand, being curious to look outside and see who's out there. But, to watch me walk all the way across the street....is creepy to me.

Post Edited (MasonsMommy07) : 3/8/2014 3:42:16 PM (GMT-7)

Hey there for lesson learned in the future you may want to be more cautious before approaching a " new neighbor" and approaching him with,   "Oh,are you our new neighbour? My name is Lisa, nice to meet you" and we shook hands.

Next time just a friendly "hello" would suffice.

His comment, " Dont think im weird for doing nails. I still like women as much as you do (to my husband)" then he looked at my son...and he said "Oh yea, I definitely like to eat THAT..sorry im trying to keep it polite" so freaking weird!!!"

If he definitely made a sexual derogatory remark and your husband was there so it feels to me it was time to cut ties right there and excuse yourself from this new neighbor.  Inappropriate sexual comments are definitely reportable.  However, you must be sure you are clear in letting him know his comments are way out of line.

Writing down and comments from this "neighbor" must be exactly what he said, date it, time it and if you have a witness, have that person also sign the complaint.

I am sorry that this has happened to you and your family and my best advice is to document what your landlord's response is to your official complaint.

Kindly,

Kitt

 

I asked one of my facebook friends if they knew him. She does, and it is her kids uncle. She said he is really harmless, but he is weird. I'm not sure if i should still be worried?

I agree that you always have the choice to keep your distance, not communicate, and simply do not engage him in conversation.

His comment, (which I'm still confused about, because it almost sounded like he was referring to your son, not women, which is why I asked), is inappropriate in,...well, pretty much any setting. But maybe not to him.

The important thing is that it's inappropriate for you and your family. You cannot control the behaviour of a neighbour, but you can control your choice of interactions with them.

I'm glad you're seeing differing opinions on the board, because sometimes things aren't always cut and dry, black and white. We've had our share of "creepy neighbours" in the past as well, but I'm trying to think, as a landlord of someone who just moved in,....what kind of action would my tenant expect me to take against being uncomfortable.

Someone "looking creepy" and having fingernail polish on and being talkative is,....different, and may be unsettling. But it's not an offense.

I do always try to give people the benefit of the doubt, and that's just my nature. But as we've all said, regardless of our thoughts, if you feel you bothered, -- do not interact. If you don't have time to chat, or answer the door,.....he will eventually get the message.

The primary reason I'm trying to put another side out is because this world is so filled with variety that sometimes we can get spooked by people whose lifestyles are so vividly different than anything we've been exposed to. It's a shock quality.

Out of curiosity, what action would you like your landlord to take?

Even in my first post, I mentioned how above all you have the right to protect your family. So you need to do what feels right to you, and for you and your family.




M.