scared and alone

Oh, I'm so sorry. There's just no getting around the devastation of losing someone close to us. Of course you're feeling scared and alone.

It's tough not knowing what happens after someone is gone, but I think you can be assured he's not in a bad place. Since what's beyond life is unknowable I hope you can come around to focus on taking care of yourself and missing your dad with all your heart, but without so much pain and worry.

The sadness of loss never goes away but it does get much, much easier.

{{{{ HUGS }}}}

Dear LF:He is still with you, He always will be, You know He wants you to be stronger, and you will be, He can take His Petition directly to our Father now, you are always in His Prayers
You are also in mine and almost everyone here at HW. He knows
you miss Him, but be comforted in the knowledge that you will
be together again, and this time there will be no end. Stay in and
with the Light, Your Daddys Prayers will see you through! Peace
Larry ***

I know exactly what your going through:( I lost my father in March and that's when I began experiencing anxiety! I also see a counselor and it helps but it's has been 5 months and I'm still questioning what happened, is he ok.... I can tell you I am better now than before but I still have bad days!! I want to wish you luck and peace!!

Dear flashing lights, you are in the early stages of grief and here is how I have coped with the agony of being kicked in the belly by a mule which is what hard grief does to us. First nothing I say here will ease your fears. I won't even try to do that. Secondly, you have never experienced this reality before because no matter what happened to you in the past or how devastating or scary it was you had your father as a haven. This time you are experiencing being in the eye of the storm with no safe place and you feel lost with no compass and no North Star and no end in sight. This is how it has to be. The only way to get through it is to go through it and that seems impossible to do without him. I know. My mom died and I fell off the edge of the known universe. A wise woman told me that I had to go through it now over it or around it in order to get through it. Everything has been torn asunder because you love him and he left through now fault of his own but still, he left and you remain here. There are grief groups and others sharing their grief with you may be of greater use to you than professional help. I found myself telling the clerk in walmart about my mom dying and her mother had died a year before and her words from her heart about how when something happened she wanted to share with her mom and she turned to the phone and was making the call before she realized that her mom was gone - well, I did not feel so alone and the agony was still there ever so strong but I was not the only one. The thing we humans cannot bear is feeling we are all alone. Grief mindedness is an altered reality and you can only hear those who are close or are in that reality.

Hi Flashing

Here is how I coped when I lost my beloved father who like yours- was my hero...

I asked for a sign that he was still with me. (OK now I may sound crazy) Several times a pure white dove came and hung around our house for days at a time. It would not let you touch it but would let you get really close without flying. On my daughters senior prom night I cried in bed- daddy I wish you could have seen how beautiful she was- almost immediately the window shade threw itself up with a racket. I find pennies from heaven to this day when I'm feeling particularly down and wishing for my dad's advice. (He's been gone 12 years)
I like to cook his favorite foods or do something that he so enjoyed during life when I miss him most. I try to live with the beliefs and morals he brought me up with so he can live on thru me.

I wish you peace,

Weary

FL.,

I know how hard it is to lose a father.:( How do you navigate the new territory that you find yourself in for the 1st time, having never been without your mentor/teacher/hero/friend?

It is difficult to imagine the pain and loss that you are going through now ever lifting...and that it okay and expected.

Trust however that though he will always be missed...the loss of your dad will become bearable. It doesn't happen right away, but you will be relieved of this deepest pain with time.

Know that we love and support you here, and are sending our prayers.

S.C.

FL.,

I would give the group a try. You don't have to say anything...just attending and being part of a group with others in a similar circumstance could bring comfort.

We are certainly here as well. You continue to be in our thoughts and prayers.

There will be a lot of up and downs...good days and bad ones. I remember that...and it was part of the challenge for sure. We want healing to be a linear process, but it is not...and the harder times catch us by suprise. Know that this is a normal part of the journey.

Eventually though, the bad days are eclisped by the better times, and moving forward does happen.

Again, my heart reaches out in compassion for you...know that we all care, and are here for you F.L.!!

Healing hugs,

S.C.