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Pay Attention! Look where you are going!

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Posted 9/23/2014 11:25 PM (GMT 0)
How did you guys read/perceive/interpret that sentence? (This is another little gem that's being unearthed from therapy, thankyouverymuch!)

A few possibilities are:

*LOOK* where you are going.

Look *WHERE* you are going.

Look where you *ARE*......going.

Look where you are *GOING.*



These are distinctly different. I've been scolded with this line since I was a child. It's only dawning on me now (today?) the distinct possibilities that can be inferred. And it applies to everything in life, not just the act of walking down a path. But let's look at both for a moment?



LOOK where you're going. open your eyes and actually see what's out there. Whether it's opening our eyes to see we're about to be charged at by an unseemly bull,...or to see that we are self-sabotaging ourselves.

Look WHERE you are going. Where do you see yourself ending up? Is your eye on the prize, the bridge you have to navigate, or are you shuffling your feet looking at your sneakers?

Look where you ARE....going. This is a big one. I think it's easy to simply take a short-sighted view and look where we are. Where,...we,...are. Where we're standing. The ground beneath us. The floor. Or where we are in our journey with anxiety, seeing nothing beyond the anxiety, the palps, the sweats, the freaking out. It's obvious to us where we *are* so that can consume us.

Look where you are....GOING. Again, a big one. How many of us have selective memory? We forget we felt like this yesterday (or the day before) and here we are, alive and kicking. Sometimes furiously kicking. We can only perceive the "now" which is our present, and we do it at the cost of where we are "going."

If we're walking down a dirt path and only look down at our feet, where we are, at this time, and don't look up to see where this path leads, we create our own vicious circle. Literally, people who are lost in the wilderness tend to walk in circles, and that's how they evade the route to escape.

We're doing the same thing if we keep our blinders on.

We have to look up. We have to pull our heads out of our Androids (or...whatever), and take stock of where we plan to see ourselves, where we want to see ourselves, and act and plan accordingly. We're not standing in the same spot right now as we were this morning when we got out of bed. We can choose to move. We can choose to see what's ahead of us and walk forward....

I'm practicing this in all manifestations. Like I said to you guys before, I'm posting this in real time, as I become more aware of what's going on. When I walk the dog, within reason I'm also looking at where the trail goes, not just at the place where my sneakers hit the ground.

I have the balance of a 3-legged spider, so I do it with caution. But most importantly,....I do it!






M.
Posted 9/23/2014 11:50 PM (GMT 0)
Love all you are sharing Merrida!! Such insightful things you are bringing back to us. This is very good. Something I am going to give some thought later... when I am done studying. :)
Posted 9/24/2014 12:48 AM (GMT 0)
Some of us spend most of our lives running from our fears, if we stop and check we also drag them along
with us, "why", when i look back at my fears i start to laugh like i have lost my mind, my fears that i drag
along with me with a rope, called childhood memories, is worn, beat up, tattered, i look at the pitiful fear
and wonder why i bothered to drag it with me?
I need it no longer, i cut the rope, I can go the rest of the way alone, "Happy". Peace to all.

Larry ***

PS:cut that rope!
Posted 9/24/2014 1:43 AM (GMT 0)
I actually thought this was going to be a thread on road rage. When I read "look where you're going", I immediately thought of some knuckle head cutting me off in traffic.

I totally agree with what is said. We all have to have a "plan" or "goal" on what we want our near and distant futures to look like. But we have to do this in a healthy way. For those of us who have GAD and focus too hard on "where we are going", it can grossly add to our anxiety. I am a perfect example of this...

Since my early twenties, I knew exactly where I was going. I had my whole life planned out in detail; who I was going to marry, where I was going to live, how many kids I was going to have, what church we would attend, how much money I would make, and what type of business we would own. I put a ton of pressure on myself to never let up - head always up and charging straight ahead full blast. The years passed as I worked diligently toward my goals. I married the woman of my dreams, had three daughters, a beautiful home, and a flourishing business. I had reached my destination, I should be the happiest man in the world! Wrong! Somewhere in the middle of growing my business and working toward my goals, I lost the sense of "me" and who I was as a person. I always lived in the future and constantly thought of how happy I was going to be after my income reached a certain level, or how I was going to feel when I bought that new car or house. I forgot to pause just a second to stop and smell the roses and find true satisfaction of where I was which was in "the NOW"!

Oh, I looked where I was going alright but my failure to stop to rest my neck and take a quick look at my feet brought on a mountain of anxiety/ stress/ and depression that I wasn't prepared to handle. Now I am taking it day by day, minute by minute. I have slowed down a lot and am now trying to enjoy the fruits of my labor and when I am playing with my little girls, I am enthralled in the moment. I know to take in each second and to truly live in the NOW because these special moments are numbered.

I guess the main thing is to know yourself. If you are high strung, type A personality, and tend to take things to extreme then take precautions on your journey after you construct your path of dreams and goals. It's definitely okay to "look where you are going", just don't lose yourself along the way or forget to stop every now and then to rest your neck and eyes. We are not promised tomorrow so try to be so grateful of the "now". Take in each second as a blessing from God. Make that phone call you have been putting off to your mom and dad (or loved one) to tell them you love them. I think that if we can set goals for ourselves and learn to make baby steps towards those goals each and everyday while embracing the now, then we would be less stressed and happier human beings! By all means,"look where you're going"! It's good advice. Just don't be afraid to embrace the now. Not having a healthy balance between the two was my biggest mistake.

Just my humble perspective

Post Edited (Cornell) : 9/24/2014 2:50:02 AM (GMT-6)

Posted 9/24/2014 1:04 PM (GMT 0)
There's no speed limit to this exercise and it can be employed in many ways. As I mentioned, I'm practicing doing this while I'm walking my doggie. Just for the simple act of getting used to what it means to look up and look forward and not hang my head down (ie: in shame, embarrassment, shyness, etc.)

Move at your own pace.

I think of all the kids walking around with their heads down stuffed into their phones texting,....almost getting hit by cars because they're looking at where they *are* and not looking at *where they are going.* Literal example, I know, but gets the point across.

BTW: I am very tightly wound and highly strung too. When I practice this for my anxiety, I do it for short intervals. I'm too wired to settle down for long-term exercise type things (except actual working out!)....but it's a new perspective, literally, and I think it's worth taking a bit of time every day to practice not being so introspective that we lock ourselves up deeper inside our shells.





M.
Posted 9/24/2014 2:31 PM (GMT 0)
awesome. :-)
Posted 9/24/2014 8:15 PM (GMT 0)
I guess my biggest challenge is I don't know how to "follow the speed limit". I know one speed and its full force, one hundred miles an hour. That's something I am working on. Thanks for sharing!
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