Insensitivity

So I need your opinions on something that's been bothering me. My best friend has been a smoker since she was 16. And granted I've enjoyed a few cigarettes here and there, but now that. Both of my grandparents are dying from smoking related lung cancer, I feel angry every time I see someone smoking a cigarette. Especially my best friend. She asks me to come out and smoke with her (to just stand there and talk) while she puffs on cigarette after cigarette and I just find it insensitive. Am I being too sensitive?

John,
Good to know I'm not alone on this one. Should I say something?

Sophie,

Yes. There are other ways to enjoy each other's company. Tell her to chew some darn gum.

John- lol. You nevr fail at making me laugh

Blu's,

You can't change other's behaviors or choices...

...but you certainly don't have to be participating, or going on smokes breaks with your friend.

She should understand once you explain things to her....she is likely just not making the connection, and not realizing what effect this has on you. :(

S.C.

Is going out with her while she smoked something you've done regularly in the past? Have you explained to her that seeing someone smoke gets you so upset now?

If you have previously done that and haven't explained the change in sentiments to her, she likely has no idea she's upsetting you.

I think you should just explain your feelings and tell her you guys can chat when she gets back from her smoke break. You don't have to go with her. That's not being too sensitive.

Don't expect her to quit smoking because of your feelings, though. That would be being too sensitive - her body, her choices.