Klonopon and addiction

I've had some kind of panic disorder all my life. The unexpected is what can really throw me into a tailspin. I was told I had a brain aneurysm last November. They were able to take care of it quickly and all is well but I spiralled out of control. My celexa went up from 20 to 40 mg per day and I was moved to the hospital psych unit. It was a very bad experience. The psychiatrist put me on visterol I believe because he absolutely refused to prescribe a benzo (Klonopin) which had had been on five years previously. It did nothing. I was having a very hard time. I transferred to a private behavioral hospital and the psychiatrist put me on .05 mg of Klonopin the next day. It made a world of difference and I was released four days later. I met with my regular psychiatrist and he agreed with the dosages of celexa and Klonopin. I told him I was concerned about becoming addicted but that I had come off it easily the last time. I started at .05 mg at 8am 2pm and 10 pm. I dropped down to .05 at 9am and 9 pm. Then I dropped to .25 at 9am and 9 pm for a couple of weeks and then only in the am and then every other day in the am. When I stopped altogether I had a panic attack in about three days. First rather mild and then full force. Knot in my stomach all day, fearful, crying. I've been like this for three days now. Do others experience these types of lengthy panic attacks or are the just short burts? I should mention that during this same time period I cut back to 20 mg celexa daily. I know it takes 6 weeks to get into your system so I think I might have a combination of not enough celexa and maybe still needing the Klonopin. I'm raising the celexa back to 40 (and another six weeks to get it in my system). I'm scared every time I take a Klonopin. I feel like I'm doing something that I will regret later. It just adds to the anxiety. .05 seems to calm me down for a few years and then I try to control the anxiety on my own. I'm starting some therapy tomorrow. Maybe all things combined and I will eventually feel better. I just want to be myself and fear that it will never happen.

Hi NR and welcome!

I too am sorry to hear of the challenges you have been facing lately. I am really glad to hear that you are now doing well with your health...and ready to fully focus on the anxiety issue.

I think that it is difficult to let go of one coping skill, without first gaining another.

So I can certainly see how discontinuing your benzo, and lowering your SSRI would put you in a vulnerable spot...you'd nothing to fall back on really.

That is why I am THRILLED to hear you are starting therapy! :) This is going to help you to 'replace' what you are seeking to reduce...your meds...and give you tools to manage your anxiety.

To enhance what you will be learning in therapy...you may also want to consider learning and using self-help techniques. We have some great ones right here in our Resources.:) See the link below, and try the ones that look helpful to you.

https://www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=9&m=104206

Keep talking with us as well. We understand, care and are here to support you anytime.

Talk to you soon,

Scaredy Cat

Yes, with time, you will find yourself forcing the smiles and cheerfulness less and less, as you recover...and it comes naturally again!

You are wise to push yourself a bit though and not isolate...as studies have shown that simply the act of smiling or laughing...even if it's not completely genuine, has postive effects on mood...so yes, 'Fake it till you Make It' does have some actual truth to it!

Try to be patient with yourself and the process. You are laying a solid foundation for your healing. It will take a while to see the results start, but it will be so worth it.;)

Keep posting if you find it helpful,

S.C.