Hi Emelly,
Please know that you are not alone in this. Its been three weeks since I have eaten a solid mean also. I know how depressing it is trust me I know. I took my mom out last night to the fair because I take her every year
opening night and honestly I was miserable. First off I hate going anymore anymore and this is something I use to enjoy but I was depressed the entire night. It was hard seeing everyone smiling and having a good time and smelling all the food that I couldn't eat. My mom also went on and on about
how good her food was which really bothered me since I just got a milkshake. My anxiety has been through the roof and I have been pretty sad lately. I don't really have anyone either but that's more so my fault because I don't like being around people anymore. I don't really know what to do myself. Sometimes I do want to just give up but then sometimes I don't. I try to get enough calories by drinking smoothies, ensures, instant breakfast and by eating soup. I am never hungry anymore for some reason so I just try to fit it in so atleast get over 1000 calories. I have been seeing a therapist but sometimes I just think she wont be able to help me. Do you take anxiety medication or anything? I have Xanax but I am too nervous to take it and my Dr did give me Lexapro but I felt sick the morning after taking it so she stopped it but I wonder if I should have given it more time.
I know what its like to miss the old you. Its like I feel like I am not even the same person anymore. Its like I am this new person that I don't like and just wish would go away. Before all this started 9 months ago I was ok. I was able to go out for lunch with friends, I enjoyed cooking dinner for me and my fiancé and I was pretty content. When I got sick I just became so overwhelmed and also at that time prior to being sick was the first time in my life things we ok and my therapist thinks it kind of freaked me out abit. I guess all we can do is try our best. Its so hard to focus on anything else but I really want to try. I was to set aside a time maybe of day where I am not going to focus on my issues, easier said then done I know.
I hope you feel better soon Emelly. Also its hard for people to understand this kind of stuff unless they themselves have gone through it or are going through it. This forum is full of people who do understand you and know you are not doing this for attention so please continue to post :)
Also I know that my cats do help me feel better. I have two of them and when they are snuggling with me it is relaxing. Maybe getting a pet would help but I think that would be a good thing to go over with your therapist maybe the next time you are able to see her or I don't know if you can call or email.
Post Edited (LAWCHICK) : 8/26/2015 11:16:11 AM (GMT-6)