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How can I help my Husband with his Anxiety?

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Posted 10/27/2006 7:23 PM (GMT 0)

scool   yeah   Hello Everyone,

           I am new to this site. And I enjoy the forums. I would like to take this opportunity to describe myself. I am a 31 yr white female from Minnesota. I am married for 5 yrs now. I have 1 son who is 4 be 5 in February 2007. I am currently a stay at home mom.

The topic is How can I help my husband with his Anxiety? My husband, is very antisocial to the outside world. Except for when he is working. Otherwise, he doesn't like to be where there is gonna be alot of people. Or doesn't like to stay long when we are at family members place. Once he warms up to people he does have a good time. My husband, seems to be quick to snap when under pressure. I want some suggestions to help my husband better cope with his frustrations and anxiety disorder. My husband, takes an antidepressant pill and an Anxiety pill.

I would love to see my husband more happy and relaxed. So please any help would be encourged and appreciated by all. Thankyou! have a nice day.

Posted 10/27/2006 8:18 PM (GMT 0)

Hello younglady.

So nice to meet you. I hope your finding everyone here caring and supportive for you. I know how hard it must be on you with what your husband is going thru but you being by his side and giving him support meens a lot to him. My hubby don't do good in crowds eather but he tries. I hope everything works out ok for you and look forward to talking again soon.

Posted 10/27/2006 8:21 PM (GMT 0)
Hi and welcome to HW.

I find that in these situations breathing techniques helps me.

It's very difficult for me in crowds...they all walk to slow for my liking!

 

I hope your hubby gets better soon xx

Posted 10/27/2006 8:39 PM (GMT 0)

your husbands meds may help, especially the antidepressant if its working, sometimes they dont work, do you think his is?

anxiety pills can help a lot if the dose is got right, more can be taken for difficult social occasions

he needs to learn new ways of calming and relaxing himself and to learn CBT, get some books on recovering from social anxiety, read them and tell him what they advise

he probably has what would be now described as social anxiety disorder for which paxil, an antidepressant is highly and expensively advertised, however, IMO any other ntidepressant is as likely to help

tell us his meds doses

most here get help from breathing deep and slow when anxious and especailly avoiding rapid shallow panting and breath holding, helped me a lot

Posted 10/27/2006 8:50 PM (GMT 0)

Hi YoungLady

The fact that you are on here really says so much about how much you care for him and want to be there for him.  That's fantastic!

The best thing that my husband does re: my anxiety is that he takes me seriously.  I have other friends and family who think that anxiety is something you can just make go away if you think rationally.  They don't experience it, so they don't understand it.  My husband has had some experience with it a number of years ago, so that really helps.  But I just love the fact that he acknowledges that it's a real issue (as opposed to just being in my head), and he doesn't judge me for not being able to control it.  If I want him to, he'll rub my back during an anxiety attack, but if I'm having a "don't touch me" kind of anxiety attack, he won't.  He's great at encouraging me to do things that push my boundaries but never forces me to.  I always know that he'll support me no matter what.  This is the best thing he could do for me....and in my opinion, the best thing you can do for your husband.

Aside from that, is there any chance he'd try this forum?  For myself, I'm finding it so wonderful to hear other people's experiences and feel like I'm not "weird" for having these problems.

Good luck!  Kudos to you for asking this question.  I know it's hard on you too.  He's lucky to have you.

B.

Posted 10/30/2006 2:58 AM (GMT 0)
I am new to this forum, actually just joined :) Sorry to hear about your husband. I hope that everything works out for you guys.

On a personal note, I am new to anxiety and panic attacks.  My dad has suffered from agoraphobia for about 20 years so I have seen firsthand the effects anxiety can have on a married couple and family.  My dad let things go for years and tried to downplay the disorder, so naturally, he has advised me to get help quick. 

I'll give you guys some history about me since I'm sure I'll be logging on pretty often.  I'm 27 years old and a Registered Nurse.  I have a pretty stressful job, not to mention I am half way through with a Master's program. I do have an awesome husband (doesn't understand anxiety though), an awesome family and most important, God! 

My whole life I have been so uptight.  My mom says even when I was little, I acted like a grown woman! For the past few months, I have had some problems with panic attacks. Here are my symptoms so maybe some of you guys can help me out if you have the same ones.  I get really flushed, feel a lump in my throat and heaviness in my chest, then I have trouble swallowing, then trouble breathing, I get in such a panic and have to really concentrate on breathing.  This only lasts a few minutes but afterwards, I am so exhausted all I want to do is sleep.  This has happened twice after leaving the grocery store and once after leaving Wal-Mart (2 of my favorite places). I am going to the doctor in the morning and having a lot of tests to rule out other disorders. 

I have read some of the other forums about those of you that focus on a disorder and panic about that and I am so afraid that because I am a nurse, that I will start to think I have every disorder coming and going! I am so thankful for any of you that have any encouraging words and I hope that I am able to help all of you as well.

Thanks for reading!   

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