ISO people like me

I had a therapist for a few months but I recently stopped going to her because even though I pay her to listen to me it wasn’t helping. I begin to explain when it’s like to live with RE and the only thing she could tell me is that she couldn’t imagine what it would be like to live my life.

I’m 22 years old. I was diagnosed with RA when I was 15, but I’d had it for at least two years before that. It started in my neck. It became so stiff that I couldn’t even look over my shoulder. My parents didn’t believe me that there was something wrong. They took me into a chiropractor, sent me to a massage therapist, and told me to stop trying to get attention. It wasn’t until over a year later when I tripped and hit my knee on a rock and it swelled up to three times the size and persisted for over a month when they finally took me into a knee specialist.

After that first joint started flaring all the rest begin to follow. I did notice that my toes in been swelling for a few months before hand and the next thing I knew I couldn’t walk, I couldn’t zip up a coat, I couldn’t wash my own hair in the shower. My parents took me to a rheumatologist who put me on prednisone and methotrexate for severe JRA, which has since been re diagnosed as early onset RA.

The rheumatologist and many other doctors told me that I had a high chance of growing out of it and that it would most likely go into remission. It’s been 10 Years, and although the pain and inflammation isn’t nearly as bad as it was when I was younger, it still isn’t better at all. I often have flareups that are related to stress and honestly The meds to stop the pain has caused just as much damage to my body as the RA would’ve in the first place. I was severely allergic to methotrexate so after that I went on Embrel which I was also allergic to. Finally after three years of struggling to find medication I was on Humira and within a few months got a kidney infection so bad that I was hospitalized for four days and the doctors told my parents that I wasn’t going to make it.

I often get very sick. I have colds that last for months. Infections all the time. Ulcers all over my body. I’m so tired of people feeling bad for me. My life hasn’t been easy at all but I just want someone who understands to talk to.

I know I’m not the only one believe me it feels like it.