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Posted 1/23/2008 2:41 PM (GMT 0)

hiya,

I have spent 2months in a psychiatric hospital following a breakdown and phsychosis and

I have been newly diagnosed as having Bipolar Disorder (still trying to figure out if its type 1 or 2). At first i thought my whole world had crashed round by my ears and tried to ignore what i had been diagnosed with.

before i was diagnosed i was very ill and emotionally hurt my friends and family around me. The thought of this being able to happen again terrifies me but i suppose this is something that will take time for me and other people to learn to deal with.

Since i have been home on leave i find i sleep an awful lot and sometimes find it very difficult to get out of bed. I also get very forgetfull ( Dori Moments i call them ). Is this "Normal"? confused

Im also very irritable even when people are being nice to me and i am finding it very hard to keep my temper and not lash out or throw things. This is a very strange feeling for me as i have never been a "violent" tempered person. I dont know if anyone could give me their opinion as to why maybe this is happening?

thank you for taking your time to read this

 

Posted 1/23/2008 3:30 PM (GMT 0)

Hello Cloudy Sky, smurf

Welcome to Healingwell. I am sure you will find a lot of information around here as you get a chance to read through some of the past posts, so take your time.

In answer to your questions, the symptoms that you describe are very commonly associated with bipolar along with a few others. Sleeping more, memory loss and become very irritable are pretty normal but that is why medications are needed to get your moods more stabilized. What medications are you taking right now? Most medications can take a while before kicking in the way they are supposed to.

I hope you already have an appointment made to see your psychiatrist soon. This should will be the person who will be managing your medication adjustments for you and it is very important that you continue to follow-up with all of your appointments.  This is where you need to become patient, as it will take some time to fine tune the correct balance of meds for you to feel well. Always be honest with your psychiatrist explaining how the medications are working for you or if you are experiencing any hard to deal with side effects. Explain to your doctor exactly how you did here about what you are experiencing. They will know which drugs are causing what.  

Will you also be seeing a therapist to help you along with your wellness program? They are essential as well. Mine has helped me to adapt/cope with my mood changes and has taught me new techniques on how to live a balanced life with my illness.

I hope I have helped some. Please continue to post and we'll all chip in and try to help you out around here. Again, Welcome.

Posted 1/23/2008 4:30 PM (GMT 0)
Hi there CloudySky and Welcome to HealingWell,

I hear from a lot of people in Depression and Epilepsy who have been newly diagnosed so I know how tough it is being newly diagnosed with anything. Some people simply try to ignore it, some people try to fight against it, and some people lash out at those around them that they feel safest with. It is completely normal for people to do this, but it is important not to get stuck in a rut trying to ignore it. You should try to move on, but in your own time at your own pace. For me, reading about Epilepsy helped a great deal with my diagnosis. Perhaps reading about Bi-Polar will help you come to terms with your diagnosis?

You mentioned that you had hurt people in the past, but it is important to remember that it was the past. It is a good sign that you are able to talk about the past and the bad things that happened. It sounds like you are in the process of moving on and thats good news to hear.

The anger and irritability you are talking about may be due to a lot of things. The anger towards your diagnosis, your meds may make you feel more irritable and if you are down at the moment, that may cause anger too. The important thing to remember is that some of this will go away in the coming months.

I am glad that you have found HealingWell and the Bi-Polar Moderators will know much more about specific resources to help you. You can also have a look at the resource section here at HW (https://www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=13&m=350839) Please keep posting as many people find that it is a good way to work through some of the issues they face. You never know... you might be able to help other people on here as well!

Darren

Posted 1/23/2008 5:40 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Cloudysky,

Let me extend a hand also and welcome you to the forum. Being in the hospital for two months is no cake walk, and you've got to expect some readjustment time now that you're home. It sounds as though you're still trying to find your feet. Be patient and give yourself a little time and room to breathe. Darren and Sukay were dead on, your symptoms sound very classically bipolar, so stick with your medications and give them time to work. I also would definitely bring them up with your psych if you haven't felt much relief in a week or so -- you deserve a break, and they can give you some faster acting drugs to help you out in the short term while your long-term meds kick in. The sleepiness may also be a side effect of one of the drugs. A lot of them cause excessive sleepiness -- again, something to tell your doc.

It's important to remember that your family just wants to see you get well. They have stood by you through this 2 months, I imagine. You're not going to scare them away now, now matter how you hurt them in the past. If you feel a higher moment, tell them your sorry for taking it out on them but don't beat yourself up about it. We carry around so much guilt about our condition and behavior, and it's really unnecessary.

serafena
Posted 1/24/2008 11:40 AM (GMT 0)
thank you everyone for your replies.

i am currently on 60mg citalopram a day and 300mg of serequel a day. i was on 600mg of the serequel but it had to be reduced as ihad low blood pressure.

i have home treatment out in the mornings now to help me a bit more starting my day. i feel incredibly stupid because i struggle to even open the curtains and i struggle to be on my own in the house. will this go away with time? i hope so.

 

Posted 1/24/2008 12:33 PM (GMT 0)

Hello again CloudySky,

Having the home treatment people come around first thing in the morning is a great idea... especially if you are finding morning difficult at the moment. Please dont feel stupid about not being able to open the curtains. If you have been in a hospital for 2 months surrounded by medical staff and patients, it is perfectly understandable that you struggle to be in the house by yourself. You have gone from having loads of people around you to having no-one and that takes some getting used to. But it will pass... the more you do something, the more you get used to it. Have you found something that makes it easier? Perhaps opening them with your eyes closed? I know it sounds silly but its the silly little things that can make a difference sometimes.  

All the best

Darren

Posted 1/24/2008 9:54 PM (GMT 0)
That's actually a fair amount of seroquel and probably helping to cause the sleepiness. It should get better with time, but if not, definitely bring it up with your doctor. It's normal for a readjustment period, absolutely. But after a while, you'll need to function more normally. But don't be in a hurry. Take the time to get the rest your body and mind need right now.
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