Alcoholic Anonymous

AA is beneficial to many. The following comments reflect towards me, only. This message is NOT to stop, or discourage those from attending AA.

I have been in a manic rage lately. I go to AA at the rare occasion. Since I have OCD and Bipolar 2, alcoholism is a symptom of my mental issues. I have been sober for 19 months. I pisses me of when I tell those that I have OCD, because they always reply: "all alcoholics are obsessive and compulsive". I agree, but for most of them it only states a personality trait. Obsessive DISORDER is different. When I am in a depressed phase, or a manic phase, they tell me that's when you really need to go to a meeting. Read, read, read the "big book" (that book is about alcoholic stories...very little help for my mental issues). I rarely have cravings to drink. If I go to a meeting in a mental state, I can't listen, I get delusional, angry or end up crying- none of which has to do with alcohol. Their suggestions piss me off. Prior to ever meeting is this comment: "There are those, too, who suffer from grave emotional and mental disorders, but many of them do recover if they have the capacity to be HONEST." and then they tell you to keep your discussion to alcohol only. I'm am honest, yes, I have the capacity to be honest, unlike what AA keeps telling us. So I'm excited to attend a meeting soon and give them a piece of my mind! I have spoke positive, lovely inspiring messages several times, and at raging times; but they cut me off for speaking- that just fuels me more. So I will mention the above as well as the reality of my mental issues which THE problem. Alcohol for me is a secondary issue. They say the cure for alcoholism is to STOP drinking. Oh gee, let me apply this to my mental disorder, perhaps, I will stop going around in circles with OCD, and stop my Bipolar Disorder, then magically it will go away and I can live in serenity- yeah, dream on. They tell us that the "big Book", "twelve steps" and getting a sponsor will resolve my issues. Could it be that can finally I get of my medication? NOT!

Thanks Serafena. What you mentioned seems more appropriate for myself, rather than attending a room full of people discussing alcoholism and sobriety time. Most AA members are uncomfortable when I talk about my mental health. Right now, drinking is low on the list of my priorities. My mood swings, rages, sound intolerance and OCD rituals are destroying the quality of my life. I've suffered these symptoms long before I began to drink alcohol. I will look for support without the pressure to conform. In AA they say there are no rules, only suggestions. AA suggestions are constantly being persuaded amongst each other and besides, many rules were derived from suggestions.

(((hugs)))

Hey Bohemian,

Check out the Depression and Bipolar Support Alliance groups. Here's the link: www.dbsalliance.org/site/PageServer?pagename=support_findsupport. You may find more of what you need there. They've seen it all. I'm guessing your OCD won't throw them for a loop.

serafena