Hell, I am just plain lost...

 Hey everyone, I stopped all my meds. I can't take this anymore. I know I am going to regret this ! I know that what I am doing is wrong but I have to try it. I missed my doc appt. today, it was like 15 min. ago. I have been a raging, hyper, mess. I guess to label it would be mania. I can't seem to keep a single thought for longer than a sec. before another one interupts that.Someone told me at college yesterday, about sitting in a tanning bed, she said oh I just lay in their and relax and not think about anything. I said you have to be kidding, I lay in their , the bed feels like it's  spinning (or maybee it's just my head), I think about 1,000 thoughts in my 15 min. of tan. Do you know how envious I was of that? That is pathetic. I am not  that bad. I am not one of those people NO one write back mad by that please. This is all reference to myself really!!!! Was I in denial, now look I quit my meds to try and be "normal". I started back to school as noted, it just seems like I am falling here. NOte the last post on introduction. Any advice , opinions, suggestions or hell just plain telling me hey, that was dumb is greatly appreciated. I hope to see more posts on here. Remember that is what we are here for, to view and help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  Peace and Love.

 From crazy N.

 Thank you for your response. To let ya know , I am back on meds. Didn't last long did it? LOL To answer your question a psychiatrist is a trained drug dealer, oh I mean they are qualified to prescribe your medication. It was a joke, noone write back please. HUMOR... Anyways, and a psychologist usually has a master's degree or Ph.D and they study the human mind and behavior. I look at them more like a therapist, counselor, essentially. They Help you with your problems , with the knowledge that they have.

They cannnot prescribe medication. Noted. Sounds like you need a new pdoc, one that spend some time with you to make the proper dx. I have a wonderful GP that treats my BP, and my diabetes... Not my female care though. I feel better today, hmmmm...... meds....maybee...look out happy, here comes your sister sad and your brother angry , oh get out of the way for pissy... ha ha

 Hello post it and welcome. I am back on my meds , I think I went like one day and realized uh.. oh.. this isn't going to work. I went through mania for a week just lately and that is why I quit my meds. I was prescribed effexor as my anti-d, and that threw me into mania for a week. Sometimes anti-d's can do that , so I am told. So per doc, I was to stop taking them, and see him this past friday, well that didn't happen because I was still crazy and not about to leave my house. So that is the day I also quit my topomax. I currently am back on my topamax 100mg, and will call my doc ( monday) and explain why I missed my appt. I have to again try another anti-d. Probably gonna try prozac again. I am diabetic and have to watch what I am on. I am BP type I, oh loads of fun. I still am looking to be stable, I also suffered from PTSD which triggered my BP, and made it 100 x worse. So I truly understand. Let me know how you are doing. I pop in and out, at least once a day , I go to urg. tech school , so I am kinda busy. Pyschnurse how ya doing? Where ya been? Hope you are ok!!!!

Hi, Kittykat!

I am so sorry to hear what a horrible time you are having - please remember not to give up.  The times we want to give up is when we need help the most. 

I am glad to hear you went back on the Topomax.  Did you get in touch with your doctor?  If so, what did he/she say?

I caution you about starting Prozac; it's in the same class as Effexor, Zoloft, Lexapro, Celexa, and all the others.  (SSRIs) They ALL cause mania, one no more or less than another; stay away!

Why not ask your doc for Lamictal - it is practically a miracle for BP depression, it doesn't work for regular people's depression and is also a mood stabilizer, you are already on Topomax, so that's good.    Welbutrin (WITH mood stabilizer) is also fairly safe for most BPs; it's not the same class as the SSRIs.

I take both and they saved my life - no joke.  I was at a point all I thought of was suicide 24/7, lying in bed totally non functioning for almost 2 months.

I do hope you talk to your doc and get this straightened out; you can't be taking ADs, going off, starting up again with same class, or you will be in the hospital, sweetie!!!

Please let me know how you're doing, OK?

Shannon

Hi, Nickie!

Sorry I hadn't been around much, I am a member of the medical team on the Doctor's Lounge.com and have been really busy there, too.  I didn't forget about you guys!

I am so sorry you are bouncing around; only thing I can tell you is that is precisely what happens with SSRIs, first you get manic, then you stop the meds, then you crash, and then up and down for a while.  That's why most pdocs will not give those to BPs, unless their condition is very mild.

As long as you're on a therapeutic dose of Topomax, as you are (but was it controlling mania before the effexor?), you can start out at 150 mg for about a week, then 300, the highest is 400mg.  It does work very well with no weight issues (except less of an appetite) and no sexual side effects, yea!  That's worth gold right there, IMO.   Plus it's cheap, you can get the SR generic, but not the XL (once a day).  If you smoke, it can really help you quit - it's the med people take for stopping smoking, too.

Lamictal is really necessary, IMO because it is also a mood stabilizer, but it keeps you from going down, it does have a good AD effect.  No knows why; it was just discovered in BP studies using it.  I take both, it's a lifesaver, literally.  Therapeutic dose is 200 mg, but you have to start low and go up slow, because in extremely rare cases, a rash that is life threatening can develop if you rush it; usually start out around 25 mg, and titrate up by 25 mg every 7-10 days.  I know, what a pain in the butt, but believe me, it's worth it.

They are both fine for diabetes, just make sure to eat enough if your appetite is reduced by the welbutrin.

I didn't know you were going into medicine!  Bravo - it's fascinating, huh?  What is the title you're going for?

As far as handling pressure; I think you have done a great job this far with being a single mom and going to college!  You will learn so much in clinicals, you might wonder why you went to book school, haha!  That will prepare you for "real world" functioning, don't worry, you will do great. 

Hey, don't ever apologize for asking questions - I'm here to help anyone who wants help or information, OK?

Let me hear from you soon, OK?

Shannon

Wow, Nickie that sounds great!  I think plastic surgery would be really interesting.

Just see how you do being a surg tech first, and if you decide to go on, great!  I always wanted to be a P.A; they are practically docs!

I'm so glad you're going to talk to your doc about those meds; let me know what he says, I'll be anxious to see!

I do hope your day gets better, hang in there.  How cliche, huh?

Shannon

No problem, anytime!  You have a great 4th, too.