Legal issues, just need to talk - newbie

Hi everyone, I don't know if I am in the right place but I tried to look for a forum that pertained to my issues and couldn't so I turned to you all. First of all, I and my 17 year old daughter suffer from Bipolar Disorder.  She was diagnosed at 15 and doing really well on meds until she met a boy and since then she has been horrible.  They have been together 1 1/2 years and I finally put a stop to things. To make a long story short, she was at the movies and he showed up and got into a fight with the boys she was with.  It turned out he was severly injured and now my daughter faces aggrivated assualt charges Felony Class 5 charges even though she didn't touch him. He told the cops that she had him set up.  Ok so that is the story.

I am sitting here in my bed and I guess I am depressed over this whole thing.  I thought we had a handle on our lives and then this.   I have been on shaky grounds lately and try to keep those feelings to myself since my poor husband has been through alot lately.

I had a miserable childhood and thought that as an adult maybe things would change.  I thank God that my husband is a great man and that my other daughter is no trouble at all (she doesn't clean her room but who does).

In the past year we have incurred $10,000 in attorney's fee's because of the trouble she gets us into and we can no longer afford another attorney without selling our house, then where will we go.

I just feel down and say life sucks for me, sorry I just needed to vent and didn't know where to turn. It helps just writing.

I simpathize with all of you out there cause I know what you also are going through.

Why did God make us this way?  I hate that we don't look physically sick so no one believes how mentally sick we are.

I am on SS and have been told numerous times that I look fine to work.  I don't feel it is anyones business to notify them that it isn't a physical issue I suffer with.

Ok now I am just typing for the nothing.....

I am sorry for the struggles you, your daughter and family are going through. As to the "what to do?" question, sell the house, don't sell the house? Don't sell the house, find counsel somehow that will not cause you to have to loose your house in the process. Just a few ideas....perhaps speak with the pdoc and see who he may know legal wise who might be willing to take the case, bring the case to a university law department and speak with some lawyers who are professors there who will keep costs down by using the case as a teaching experience for some 3rd year law students to be his support & research while he represents the case? it could help keep costs down - and law students can be HUNGRY for a win.... Go to the TOP law firm in your area and ask them to take the case pro-bono (or on a sliding scale) due to how up to this point it has drained your financial resources...etc. While the legal system is here for a reason...it can be a VERY imperfect system. It sure seems to me you are getting caught in the vortex of that at the moment. While the charges your daughter are up against are VERY serious, is she the ONLY one being charged? What about the boys who beat the guy up? Are they being charged? What is going on there?

If you are with an attorney you are really pleased with, but can not continue to afford him....go to him and ask him to shift the case to either PRO-BONO work or reduce his rates. Or ask him to work out some financial agreements with you that will allow you to pay him - without burying you. IF he REALLY believes in the case - and is PASSIONATE that your daughter is being wronged and railroaded...he just may surprise you? Go to the legal aid society and ask for help paying for the costs - AKA financial aid for legal services.

I am sure much of what I have suggested you have already thought of, but I thought I would put it out there anyway. Sometimes it helps to hear it again and revisit some ideas. In the interim....both you and your daughter must take VERY good care of yourselves and be working with your pdoc's regularly. It is CRITICAL to help you stay stable and clear thinking. Otherwise, given the BP...if you are swinging too much, your viewpoint can be off as a result, and then you are not dealing with it as effectively as you need to...which can cost you more money as a result.

Good luck to you all and hang in there. LFW

Post Edited (loving frustrated wife) : 2/16/2008 8:59:00 PM (GMT-7)

Good news all around, though what an ordeal for your family, especially your daughter, who, as you say, will still have to testify. You sound better too, less hopeless. Thank you for the update.

serafena