Thank you for welcoming me to the board as the spouse of a BP man.
After 9 years, and MUCH counselling (me, he refuses to go), I am looking at leaving (again). It's not the first time, and the trouble usually revolves around my children (28 and 25 year old males), or my friends, although no one comes over anymore.
Things have been going better for the last year or so and I had relaxed more. I'm always on edge though when the kids are visiting. I don't want to bash spouse, although I'm very angry, frightened and confused. Last weekend, spouse exploded out of the blue on my eldest, and was threatening and verbally abusive.
I'm tired of trying to figure this out. I'm just tired. I'm 53 and have multiple sclerosis, which has worsened in recent years. He has stated twice recently, that he is having suicidal thoughts again. He owns LOTS of guns and a couple of crossbows, although the guns are stored correctly I believe.
I have tried to talk with him, and suggested he call his pdoc about his medication, but no luck.
Any thoughts on any other paths besides leaving? If I can't talk to him successfully, and I have a concern about his mental state, the firearms, my children, myself, should I call his doc? a crisis centre?
Things are not in crisis right now. He has been calming down for a few days.
Sorry for the long post. 
I am concerned.
Thanks,
Sandy 