I might need to slow down a bit in my love life.

 

   I went out on a date last night, it was nice. But afterward i got the feeling that i'm really not ready to be out there dating yet.

   I have said here before, that part of this desease is learing what i can and cant handle. And right now i am getting the distinct feeling that i am not ready for anything more than casual dating. I have learned that if i try and fight against this desease the wrong way, it will bite me in the butt.    

 I have been so good with all my BP symptons the last 4 months. Aside from some small issues that i have dealt with i have been almost sympton free. This is the first thing i have run into where i felt i was in over my head.

   So i am not going to go out with anyone serious for  along while, I might go out and just have dinner with someone, but i know in my heart that i can't handle a serious relationship right now. Best to just concentrate on work, health, puppy, and getting thru the divorce. THat i think is a full enough plate for right now.

   Bill

 

 Yea, i have decided to not date. I told the girl i was seeing for 2 weeks i needed to step back. She understood. My life has to follow this path. ME, my health(bike riding, walking thor), working, and getting thru this divorce with as little stress as possible.

   So as much as it will break the hearts of millions of women, i am removing myself from the dating pool. I expect the nation will take notice and fly th eflags a half staff or something.

   One thing i have learned, has been to listen to my inner voices (The good ones ) My inner voices last night were screaming at me that this is the wrong time. I allready feel more at peace.

   However we much acknowage the sadness of all the women who will never know me.    

  Bill

When the right girl comes along, you probably won't feel like that, and you're right, if you feel like you're not ready, trust your gut!!! It took me 2 years after my divorce before I was ready to settle down, and it happened when I finally found who I believe to be my soulmate!!! My fiancée is the one who convinced me to get help, coz before that (about a year and 1/2 of those 2 years), I was completely manic!!! I don't know where I'd be today had I never met my fiancée!!! But, like I said, before that, I wasn't ready, I never wanted to get serious, and I never let myself get emotionally attached to anyone I dated. And if they got attached or asked me to make it official w/ them, I'd pull away... Deep down, I knew I wasn't ready.

   Yea, dealing with her put me into a mild mania. Nothing to serious, just mild. Heck i didnt do a darn thing that was fun. LOL LOL  No spending, no sex, not even cafeene. BOOOORRRINNNGGG

  Naw, i just need a lady who wants to just date, dinner, visits to different things, that kinda thing. This other one was way to serious way to quickly. No thank you, i gave at the office. LOL LOL LOL

Bill