My bi polar is taking over

I lost my temper today... Bad!!!!! The instant rage is something I've had control over (for the most part) since I've been medicated. I got mad at my fiancée over something sooooo stupid and I just blew up!!! Now I'm regretting the whole situation, but I know I can't take it back. I can't stand myself when I act like that... And the worst part is, after the rage, and the fighting, comes regret and depression. I feel so bad, and stupid, and childish. I can say I couldn't help it, I know, with this disorder, we will have these episodes from time to time. I'm just sad now.

That's what I continue to do everyday!!! Its a constant battle, but I like to think of my bi polar as my evil twin lol... Sometimes it gets the best of me.

hah, I get the evil twin thing. it fits me also. but I am trying real hard to be a righteous man, no matter how hard that is. but slipps, falls, and failure is part of the human condition. so I accept that and move on.