Posted 5/18/2012 2:47 AM (GMT 0)
Some call it detachment, letting go, making plans but not planning the outcome....so easy to say...so hard to do. But somehow today it happened to me. I have always asked.....just how does one DO this letting go? It is not self will or self knowledge...it is more like something or some divine power gave it to me. I didn't do it myself. Not a whole lot matters because I can only affect so much...so much is out of my hands. If my son blames me now for his own poor choices...that is ok but I don't have to chase him down and try to make it all ok. Just let him be. My husband is not speaking to me because he is raging about the police disrespect and is on painkillers and I asked him to not say anything else negative to me last night. So I am getting the silent treatment! But I don't mind...I can't nor do I want to make things all rosy. Why bother? Let it be.
It is like I am being un-velcroed to people, situations, events. I never know what tomorrow will bring...the interesting thing about not knowing is there is always a gift to open...a surprise. I can't get into the depth of what I am trying to say because I am frolicking like an otter in the shallows of a clear mountain creek. I am not in turmoil today. I think this is serenity perhaps. I am ready to be driven around instead of steering the wheel. I'll sit in the back seat and look out the window...know what I mean?