Flights of Fantasy - hypomania

Hey, I've been aware that I've been hypomanic and have managed it and my hypomania was confirmed by my pdoc yesterday, and my meds changed.

I met this guy while I was hospitalised last week. we connected but I didn't think anything of our connection. I was actually irritated by his self destructive tendencies and had a PTSD response to the jealousy I felt about all the support and love he has in his life despite just making poor choices.

Anyhoo, when he got out he asked me to visit him. I said no because I was on the tail end of that annoyance with him. I had a FB friend ring and she bouyed my mood.

I decided to visit him. We had a lovely evening. Even though I was hypomanic I declined his offer to stay the night (full points to me). Ever since I have had these flights of fantasy about him. Yes, we connected but he certainly isn't a realistic partner for all the dreams my hypomania have created around him in my head.

I rang him the next morning and told him I'd ring him in a week, that I had things to do for me after discharge from hospital, and that if there was any substance to our connection it would still be there once we sorted our respective issues out a bit more on our own. He wholeheartedly agreed.

So here I am a silly little bipolar chick still craving this man who is probably completely unsuitable, waiting for the hypomania to pass.

I write a) to show what hypomania can do and b) to show we can still hose things down and take time out until it passes.

I feel really embarrassed about my crush on an unviable partner as a middle age woman - like I should know better, but at least I know it is my illness and I'm not letting my illness lead me up dark alleys.

Good for you for not staying, who knows what could have happened with someone you barely know. Is he bipolar as well? Either way, just keep doing what you need to do and get better before you jump into a relationship, especially in the mania phase. I've suffered too many times to tell because of mania and not caring who I went home with. It defintely does not make you feel good about yourself when you come down. So kudos to you. Best of luck.

Absolutely keep those walls at 3/4's and don't give him money under any circumstances, sick pet, sick grandma etc. As were close to the same age(middle)I know you know all the traps and tricks, I also know i would need to be reminded, especially if hormones were involved. Due to medical issues as well as mental I've been single for 7 years
so I am really impressed that you are so strong and i take notes in case it ever again happens to me Angie