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Bipolar Disorder
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Posted 10/5/2014 10:56 PM (GMT 0)
My husband is Bipolar 1. His first incident showed up in 2007 status post surgery for colon cancer. He had one manic episode followed by 2 weeks of his normal behavior and then one depressed episode. Then he was just fine for 5 years. In 2013 he had to be hospitalized during an extreme manic period. He was in for 21 days and I thought possibly discharged too soon. He refused to take any medication and psychiatric treatment. He was charged with writing bad checks and had to do community service and complete an ARD program. I've left him 3 separate times.

Since 2013 he has been cycling every Fall into a manic state and every Summer he is depressed. He has ruined us financially twice.

He finally agreed to start medication Summer of 2014. And he met with a psychiatrist. Good news I know. However, it is now Fall and he is cycling back into the manic stage. I have to keep him away from our bank account. In fact, because we have been good customers for many, many years, the bank keeps covering his overdrafts!

I need support. I'm angry and frustrated. I'm fearful that he will do something risky. I'm tired of the verbal abuse. I need support badly. Thank you.
Posted 10/6/2014 7:20 AM (GMT 0)
welcome to the forum. hmmm. sounds like some effective case-management is required. are you receiving any community based assistance. other things like p.d.r.s, here in australia, don't know where you guys are are very helpful. psychiatric disability rehabilitation services. they tailor psycho-social support programs and tailor a program in sole regards to the clients needs. (these are day programs) out patient day programs are excellent but are usually expensive. ask questions of your local psychiatric services. they have these places and programs about but play there cards close to there chests. also respite services may be avail. where you get a break. usually a bit of a wait but they do exist. keep asking!!!! you have to with these departments. i will post if more comes to hand. many healing thoughts i send.
Posted 10/6/2014 3:57 PM (GMT 0)
Hello Chris K,

Welcome to the forum! I am glad you joined us.

I am sorry to hear your hubby is cycling back into a manic episode. Does he attend therapy as well? This can be helpful to him. Maybe you can try talking to his psychiatrist just to let the doc know about your observations.
If it possible for you to attend therapy together? This way you can discuss all the issues together.

Happy Turtle gave you some great advice and points. Check your local hospital and see what programs are available.
Please feel free to check out our resources area where there are helplines and helpful sites listed:
www.healingwell.com/community/default.aspx?f=13&m=350839

Please also remember to take care of yourself as well.

I hope thing will improve.

UA
Posted 10/6/2014 6:40 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you for the reply. I'm happy that my husband is currently taking some medicine. He is in a state where he doesn't think he needs it. (Again). I'm hoping he will keep his next dr appointment. I will call the dr and let him know what is going on. Maybe he can see my husband earlier. Can I be candid and state that I just hate this. I feel like I'm walking on egg shells. He can turn mean in a minute. It's like being married to some stranger. It must be difficult for him. It certainly is for me. It is wonderful to know that there are people willing to help.
Posted 10/7/2014 3:51 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Chris - and thanks for opening up about all the struggles you’ve faced with your husband being bi-polar. It’s great that your bank understands, too. My heart just ached as I read your post, and I wish I could give you a hug - I just cannot imagine going through what you're experiencing. It's pretty obvious that you want to have a good marriage and happy family, so please know that I will be praying for you and your husband. Have you ever considered talking with a counselor? Do you think that's something that might be helpful for you personally? A good counselor might be able to give you some solid guidance. I hope you’ll get through this soon, friend. Praying for you!

-Pugsmum

Posted 10/7/2014 5:44 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you, Pugsmum. I do have a psychologist and she is terrific! When I need tools to deal with everything she is a wonderful help. My husband would not attend. "It's not him, it's everyone else."
I just downloaded a book, When Someone You Love is Bipolar by Cynthia Last. I'm not very far into it yet but it is helpful to know that a lot of my feelings and reactions are typical of spouses in my position.
All prayers are greatly appreciated!
Posted 10/13/2014 6:18 PM (GMT 0)
Chris K, coping with your partner's mood can be tough. Be sure to take care of yourself.

UA
Posted 10/19/2014 5:12 PM (GMT 0)
Hello friends,
Feeling like the only person in the world who knows what I'm going through. My husband is full into hypomania. My head understands that his illness is talking but it still hurts a lot when he is mean to me and then can immediately be friendly and nice to strangers and other people. Need more coping skills for sure. Appreciate any help! Thanks!
Posted 10/21/2014 5:28 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Chris,

When you feel overwhelmed, try deep breathing. This helps to relax and calm you.
Positive distractions are a good technique. Try watching some funny movies to help change you mood. You can also go to the movies with some friends or somewhere just to hang out.
Try doing things that you enjoy.

Talk a walk outdoors. It can be relaxing.

Journaling helps me. I keep write my feelings down and it helps me feel better.

Please know that we are hear for you. Keep posting as it helps.

UA
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