is bipolar same as being crazy or insane

I got that sense about your SIL. Ain't it grand? We can't pick our relatives.

I think you're wrong about being stupid. We've been chatting for a few days now, and I think you're smart.

So seriously, why do you think your depression is so severe?

Ooops, my bad. SIL = Sister in law.

So why do you think that it is that you can't function at all? Why is your depression crippling you like this?

God wants you to suffer? Tell him you'll get back to him on that, you're too busy right now.

You keep deflecting my question, which says to me that you know exactly what I'm asking you. I don't care what your IQ is. I just really want to know why you think your depression is ravaging you so completely. Help me intellectualize what's going on with you.

No, I don't think your doctor said that. I think your doctor said that you wouldn't get better unless ___________. Or maybe your doctor said you wouldn't get better until ___________. Sometimes we only remember what we want to remember.

Okay, so tell me this. You cite genetics and chemical imbalances as the reason you're depressed and those are really good reasons. So what's the difference between you and your grandma? How come she could do things and you don't think you can?

Yeah, I only asked because I think it's meaningful. Your grandma made it, and you can too. Everyone, and I mean EVERYONE who's felt as low as you do now honestly thought they would never get better. But they do, and so will you.

Enough about all this stuff. I have a serious question for you: do you know how to get rid of mice? My backyard is full of them.

Yeah, I've been searching on the internet to find a way to trap them. I want to relocate them, I don't want to kill them. I found a cool little trap that captures them alive, but it only holds 2 mice at a time, and I've got dozens of the little things. I was hoping I could find a huge mouse house that 30 or so could go into and I could just drive 'em out to a field.

Guess I'll keep looking.

You're right. Heck of a lot easier to deal with depression if you have some help, but it's not impossible to do on your own. As far as someone caring for you, you found this place, and it's pretty caring.

Religion? I dunno, works for some people, but it's not my thing.

You ever go to church?

Heheheh ... none taken. ;-)

Home Depot was next on my list - I found the little traps at Canadian Tire, so if I get desperate enough, I'll buy those.

My dad was an alcoholic too, although he was really high functioning. I don't think he ever put my mom through too much crap though. He was good enough with me and my brother.

Are there lots of women saints? I only know of Mother Theresa, or is she a saint?

Ugggh. Depression is so insidious. First our family feels bad for us. Then they get pissed off because we're "not happy". Then they get even madder because we "should just get over ourselves." The madder they get, the more depressed we get, and around and around it goes.

Blerg.

I had a lot of fences to mend after my last depressive episode. Was hard work, and it wasn't fair, but it's nice to have those people back in my life.

Heheh ... you're not even 60 yet, so the 'too old' thing doesn't wash with me.

If you're like every other depressed person on Earth, you probably don't wanna go out anyway. When things start falling in place you can figure out what you wanna do.

I like going to concerts.

I'm gonna log off in 20 minutes. Anything you want to chat about before tomorrow?

If we don't talk, have a good night. :)

That sounds like a really nice dream. :)

Howdy carlarenee. Good morning to you.

You're right, nursing homes tend to smell like pee and fish sticks. LOL

Actually, the home that wife and I volunteered in was nicknamed "The Love Boat" by the staff, cuz all of the occupants kept hooking up with each other. I would tend bar at their Saturday "socials" and all the drunk women would start hitting on me. ;-)

The average age there was 75ish, with outliers on both ends. Youngest was 65, oldest was 101. Generally those who were younger were there with spouses who were older.

You could go to the crappiest retirement home you could find, but you'll still find a sense of camaraderie and friendship. Humans, when we're not totally depressed, are pretty remarkable critters.

You sound better this morning. :)