Concern about sister.... bipolar?

She is late for EVERYTHING.  She has been late up to four hours for Christmas.  She comes in at the tail end of events when everyone else is starting to gather their things to leave, and then is disappointed that they aren't staying.  Most of her friends won't have anything to do with her anymore.  The ones that are still hanging on miss the old, former self so much.

Her last visit to my house she was like a maniac.  Talking fast, acting overly friendly, talking only about herself and making us all really uncomfortable.  She had invited herself over to a cook out we were having with our adult daughter, who used to be so close to her.  Even Melissa escaped as soon as she could.

Our daughter works at a local hotel, where my sister was staying.  There is another young woman who looks a little like our daughter from a distance.  My sister spent 45 minutes talking to this young woman about personal and family matters without once realizing it wasn't her niece!

She has expressed disappointment to me that Melissa was so aloof and has lost her family values.  I told her it wasn't Melissa she had been talking to and she told me emphatically it was her niece she had been talking with!

I am out of town for a month.  My sister asked if she could hang out in my house.  A week later, my neighbor calls me to tell me my sister is now living in my house for that whole time.  Daughter stopped by and tells me the house is a mess, with uncovered food drying out in the refridgerator, the recycling bin knocked down with cans and such covering the floor of our porch, soda cans stacked up all over.  She borrowed my daughter's cell phone to call the electric company; we think she needed to make payment to them to restore her service.  A week ago her phone was cut off and was later restored.  She seems unable to pay her bills, find her house and car keys.

She is touchy, no one knows what will set her off.  We walk on egg shells around her and then when you make a mistake, she calls us controlling and tactless.

This hurts so much.  I used to be so close to her and we sheltered each other through the problems of life.  Now I don't even want to see her.

Thank you for your reply.  She is under the care of a psychiatrist for meds related to fibromyalgia and ADD.

It seems more than FM and ADD.

Thanks again.  It is nice to hear from someone and receive a little sympathetic reply.

Ellie,

Thank you for your reply.  You asked some thoughtful questions.  My siblings and my mother will be no help.  But my daughter and  husband may be.  Plus she has two friends who have not bailed on  her.

I called a roommate from college today.  My friend is now a social worker, plus she knew my sister in the old days when we were all in college together.  She and I thought that a letter to her psychiatrist detailing her current functioning may help him point the therapy or treatment in a more appropriate direction.

I have thought that she may be either misusing the ADD meds OR the meds have become too strong since they have caused her to lose a lot of weight.

Bless you for your observations and questions.

Cheryll in WI

just want to second what ellie said.  an intervention is in order.  like ellie, it doesn't sound like BP or BP alone, or like a reaction to meds.  but one never knows.  your idea of writing to the pdoc sounds very sound.  if you feel as though the problem may be more immediate, you may consider phoning.  it's hard to tell how immediate the problem is from your post.

wish you lots of luck.  you aren't in an enviable position.  know how that is.  we are with you and i'll keep you in my thoughts.

warren

Thank you, lazy, warren, and wmnak!

I so much appreciate your wonderful words.  It helps so much to get real feedback.  You have helped a great deal.

Blessings,

Cheryll