Hi Kimmy,
I'm so sorry you're feeling all over the place today!
Can you try to find something to focus your thoughts on like perhaps a hobby, puzzle, or a favorite movie? Wen said she would find relief from coloring on paper or coloring books. When I was in the hospital, that helped me too! (Well, I too still do that at home! I already bought some Christmas coloring books. It's amazing how those around me start to pick up crayons too and start to color with me. I guess it's soothing for a lot of people. (My kids are older too, 25,21&19)
I remember you saying in chat that you needed to make an appt. to get your lithium levels checked. Maybe something is off kilter and could be the reason for how you are feeling. Can you try to get in Monday for that?
Is there somebody you can call, that may want to spend the evening with you, watching tv, a movie or just chit chatting and having some hot coco/tea?
I hope you get over this hump, until you can see your doctor too. Let him/her know what you have been going through all week. Good Luck Kimmy...and get rid of those nasty thoughts just as quickly as they pop into your head.
Talk with you soon! (((((BIG HUGS))))))