Hi Ladies,
Wish I could SEE my deck under the two feet of snow still on it. We're covered. Husband makes cabinets, ladies, custom. "He da man" Let me know if you want more info. My kitchen is not custom, and forget about granite in my life. We're mica people all the way.
I haven't gotten spiles on the trees yet for the maple sugaring we were planning on doing. so the sap's running away right now! This past weekend was just too much weatherwize and tired wize. Have the materials out and ready, just the gumption to treck in the snow and forge pathways is what's missing. I wonder sometimes how I do all this work and keep sane. Health is good, asthma acts up sometimes. Guess it's really COPD. Matthew's 8 as of this past Monday. Wow, something, huh?
Things at work are pretty great. I can't complain, really. Maybe, my boss says, in like five years or more, I can publish a really really fascinating case I was part of. The present climate is not conducive to any career-advancing stuff at the moment, due to administration above my boss. I don't care as long as my boss stays. All around her are trouble, but she's great.
I'm truly grateful for my career and my family and my place in the world at this moment, and that's really all I can expect, more than, really if you think about it. I must have done something really great in another life to deserve this. The gift of the education and compassion to help others and noticing Rewards everyday is how I try to honor the gifts. I keep saying if you do really good deeds in this life, maybe you get to come back as a housecat or my friend Mike's dog or some upper pinacle of existence like that! This life is a pretty full one! What's next?
Money~well, that's another story. Have had trouble sleeping due to money worries. The problem is I can't afford my life and I have avoidant tendencies, procrastinate, and it tends to bite me you-know-where. It's really dysfunctional, and sometimes scary. Well, I've been in one of those "growth experiences" because reality's hitting. My Uncle Matt is a wonderful help to me in my crisis. If he didn't hold my mortgage..... well, I'd be in a spot millions of Americans are in or are going to be in. I think he anticipated this...maybe he knows me and he probably anticipated the financial crisis upon us now? Because of him, I'm currently safe, but will try to face my demons too. It's a tough thing, the last thing, the demons regarding money. I feel like all of the challenges I've had in my adult life, wild childism, many car accidents, analysis, school and doctorate, marriages, CANCER, childrearing, have all been met, and imaturity has been stripped away and problems worked on, but here's the one deep-seeded issue that's left--avoiding and procrastinating. It's reared it's ugly head and is in my face. I need a maid and a financial planner and a mommy, really.
I'd like to write it off to some depression or something like that, but I'm just tired and lazy and want to play when I get home from my 10 hours away every day. There's no pill for this (I've asked!) I don't do housework unless someone's coming over, and clean the kitchen about once a week. I demand husband help, and sometimes get it.
That's it in a nutshell. Thanks for reading, I wanted to get this out, but didn't have the nerve to write so much uncancerrelated. Thanks for this string!!!!! I'm having friends over this Saturday. so I'll be a basket case tomorrow, probably. Overall, life's good.