Posted 4/16/2007 12:21 AM (GMT 0)
Hi, Brenda. There are lots of sites that describe the actual process of a mastectomy (check out the resource center here), and of course, there is the staple book that every breast cancer survivor should own, Dr. Susan Love's Breast Book. But if you want to know what it is LIKE to have a mastectomy, you have come to the right place. I remember rolling over on my side and crying as they wheeled me off to the operating room. I was out by the time they actually got me there. I had a TRAM-flap reconstruction done at the same time as the mastectomy, so when I woke up, I already had the new breast in place. It was not as traumatic as I had imagined it would be. I remember reading Betty Rollins' book First, You Cry, many years before, and she described hiding in the closet in the dark to change her clothes, afraid to look at herself, much less let her husband look at her scar. Well, I was determined not to be that way, so I was exposing myself to anyone who wanted to look at the breast, even while I was still in the hospital! That sounds kind of crazy, but then, most anyone here will tell you, I am kinda crazy. But you know, I think it actually helped. No one passed out. No one said, "Oh, you poor thing..." (Well, my mother-in-law did, but she doesn't count), and almost to a person, they lied and told me how great it looked. I think it really helped me feel better about it. Let me tell you, there are worse things, and I can only imagine that being dead instead would be one of them. So keep your chin up, cry when you need to (there are lots of shoulders here), and you'll get through this, too, sweetiie.
Hugs...
BEV