work giving me pressure about days off

Snue, I know just how frustrating it is. I went through the same things. I wanted to be a good employee & I tried really hard to do my best but the days off due to illness, the days I could only make it half days & the times off for Doctors appointments was just too much. I finally realized after months of this that I was not doing my job well enough & decided I had to quit my job. When I did quit my employer thanked me. I know they were trying to keep me but were to the point they had to do something so my days were numbered anyway. I had been in my position for years & had been one of their better employees but none of us knew how to handle me with an illness. I was really upset at first but over the years have come to realize I am not employable. I am now on Social Security disability and have come to terms with the fact I can't work due to both CFS & Fibro.

Are you married & does your spouse have an income you can live on until you can find your way? If you have to work, just do your best, that's all you can do. I know for me I tried to get to work on time but I was always sleeping hours into when I should be at my desk, it was affecting everyone at work. I hope you can get your work schedule ironed out & you can stay on top of it. Take care & please come here & vent. Many soft hugs, Denise

Susan, it is so nice you have a supporting partner, a lot of people don't. My husband was very supportive of me until he died unexpectedly 3 years ago. When he died I had no insurance or income & lived for about a year with my daughter supporting me. It was hard until I got my Social Security disability & Social Security spousal support. We were totally unprepared to say the least.

Do you feel like you can really still work or is it wishful thinking? I spent a good 2 or so years thinking I was just being lazy & I could go back to work at any time. I thought I wasn't really ill. But one day it hit me I was ill & I had an illness. Some can work with CFS if they pace themselves & if it is the right job. You must work within your energy envelope, have you read the spoon theory? You can find it on the Fibro forum under the Fibro 101 thread. What you are feeling are real feelings & real symptoms. Depression is something we have to deal with too. It is the same with any illness because of the loss of our lives as we knew them. But you still have a life, you just have live it differently & at a different pace.

I am sorry you are going through this. It is so hard & overwhelming but you can and will get through it. Pace, pace, pace. Don't overdo anything because you will get a double whammy with both FM & CFS. Take care, Hugs, Denise