Just a Thought

 Gramps, I can't tell you how touched I was that you responded to me in the other post.  I have been gone for awhile and the reason for that is that I was feeling ignored by this group.  Now I know people cannot answer every post and as pain patients I know that we can be sensitive and I'm only speaking for myself so I wanted to wait it out and not be over-sensitive.  But then one of the most scary and stressful events happened when my mother ended up paralyzed shrtly after having a pump inplanted, as you know gramps since you were the only one who replied.  Even if others didn't know anything about pumps it would have been nice just to have supportive replies.  After seeing that I had only one reply I encouraged myself not to become too discouraged and updated things with my mom.  And still no replies, no hang in there's no questions to how she or I was doing.  So finally I had to admit that I was not being oversensitive, but for some reason and I'll take some of the responsibility, I was not connecting with this group.

So I waited awhile and just lurked and then I answered a few posts with support and to my astonishment they thanked the others who responded by name but completely left me out. So I don't know what more to do.  Again I thank you gramps for always responding to me.  I'm just trying to come to terms with already having it difficult to connect with "normal" heathly people to having difficulty here where I should fit in.  To my knowledge, I have never been rude or insensitive or disheartening, only supportive and wanting to be a part. Again, I never expected everyone to respond, but when going through one of life's trama's it would have been nice for a few words of encouragement.  Oh, and if anyone cares, my mom is doing better.

Sorry Gramps, I know you just wanted to welcome me back and as I said I more than appreciate it.  I guess after being ignored again after trying to be a part of the group once again just got to me today.

Melissa

Hi Melissa, im not sure if our paths have ever crossed, but i just wanted to respond to ur post.

Im so sorry to hear about what happened to your mom, that must be so horrible, im glad to hear that she is starting to do better! did she have a pain pump put in???

anyways, im glad u reached out, im sure that no one was purposfully ignoring you..im sure u will get alot of responses here....i am online alot and would love to chat if ur ever on! hugs, and hang in there w/ us, this is a great group, and im glad u brought up how u were feeling! shannon

Melissa:

I, too, am sorry that you felt ignored. I don't remember seeing your post, either. Has it been long since you posted it?

I'm glad you spoke up too. I'm still relatively new to this site, but as others have said it seems that the people here really are caring and supportive. Let us make up for it now. The situation with your mother does sound really scary. Are you her care-giver? Is the paralysis permanent?

Hey guys, thanks for the quick replys.

PAlady, I debated for a long time about saying anything as I know everybody doesn't read all the posts and I didn't want to jump tp conclusions, but when I was ignored a few days ago and Gramps welcomed me back in that post I decided to say something, but thanks for the warm response

lassieluv and ryand, I've been posting for quite awhile actually, about18 months.  I posted about my mom back in December,  then I tried again in April and then finally a couple days ago. But hey, I really appreciate your responses now.

Shannon and Underbus, my mom had a pump inplanted December 06 but she wasn't getting a lot of pain relief from it.  It turned out she had a fall in March 07 that had dislodged the cath.  So in December07, they went back in and kept the same pump in, but a new cath. about a week later she said she started to feel numb in her legs and on the day of her appointment with the neuro, while she was dressing for that appointment, she went paralyzed and fell to the bed and couldn't move her legs.  She was rushed to the hospital and had the pump completely taken out and what they said was they found meningitus in the cath, gave her strong anti-biotics.  After that she went in patient to rehab for about a month and she just finished out patient rehab.  She still has issues with one leg but over time should have a full recovery.  It was really scary as she also lost bathromm control on both, she couldn't feel when she needed to go and then she needed to go but couldn't so we had to cath her at home.  I am so glad she is better, but it was rough.

Mochiah, I hope your mini vacations are for good reasons, not health related.

Thanks again for reaching out now and hope you are doing well.

Melissa

Thanks for sharing the details for those of us who missed the first time. All this about the pumps kind of makes my head spin. Some people seem to have wonderful results, while others, like your mother....well, horror stories. Of course, I guess that's true with many of the treatments we all try.

I hope your mother continues to improve, and that the worst is behind both of you.

And Sethia, I can't believe all that's on your plate! My good thoughts are with both of you.

PaLady

Dear Melissa,
I'm so sorry I did not respond to your reply about pain pumps and it's basicly cause I don't know anything about them. I think the pain pump is used as a last resort, but I don't know and I'm sorry your mother went thru a hard time with her's. Please pass on my well wishes to your mother and soft hugz....
Please know that people here care, even though you might not get many responses.
Hugz

Sethia, welcome to the board and I am so sorry about your parents.  My grandmother practically raised me and she died of cancer. It is really hard.  I have melanoma, but am doing OK.  My prayers are with you.

PAlady, chartreux and Freda, I know people care, that's what makes this a great place.

Mochiah, I knew what you meant! And even though it means I am suffering with CP, I'd rather be a part of a group like this with substance and character and knowing what's truly important, then worrying about the shallow things. So now that I'm official, lets have a party!

Gramps, you have no need to apologize, I always see you post and I"ve learned a lot from you.

Deliah, eeehh! Just the word bladder infection gives me the hebegebe's(sp?) With my disease I have them all the time and I HATE them.  When my mom was having problems, she tried to use that stuff that numbs your bladder and then she couldn't tell when she had to go so that's when she had to be cathed.    She's lucky though, as she said she can never feel being cathed even the ones they keep in for awhile, not me, yuck!  Sorry guys if that was TMI.

I hope everyone is doing well tonight

Melissa

melissa,

look, kid.  i am the only one allowed to be invisable in every forum in HW.  it's MY job, darn it!  keep your perfectly good fingers and hands out of my grimy invisibility.  get it?

with love,

warren