Pete,
Sometimes kids go on-line to try to understand their parent's illness. Parents don't always want to talk with their children for fear it will frighten them too much. Kids are pretty inventive, though, so they go in search for information on their own. Parents do hold some responsibility to monitor their child's on-line activities, but we also assume some responsibility, esp. since on this forum we actually have youth who are suffering themselves from chronic pain.
There were definitely other things I've been told over the years that I made a point not to include (even though they are perhaps even sillier than those I did post) in an effort to keep the kids in mind. I think as long as we remember that children could be reading & also that some people log in from work so we need to keep things PG enough that they don't get in trouble we'll be good.
I do agree with you that everyone seems to want to say they have it the worst of all. Ironically, the people who actually do have it worse off than me never make such ridiculous comments. Now I usually don't even say what's wrong with me, but god forbid I even say something as benign as "I have a birth defect" I preface it with "I'm sure I don't have things as bad as you, but ..." Most of the time that does the trick. Sometimes I still get some kind of crazy fool who makes some comment about
"yeah. I get horrible back pain whenever I have to help a family member move. It's so bad I can't even get out of bed at all for days or weeks at a time. I can't eat or drink or anything. I think I might have broken my back the one time. I nearly died. Finally, I gave in to my wife's suggestion & (took a few Advil, took a warm shower, iced my back, etc.) and I was able to recover after that, but it was WORSE THAN YOU COULD EVER IMAGINE!!!!!" (capitals to show their emphasis)
Now, I do try to give people the benefit of the doubt & even when they say something totally made up I try to say something sympathetic. But I really have to bite my tongue to keep back what I want to say. What I'd like is some sort of pocket translator that could put their descript
ion into plain English (or perhaps we could get the fairies learn to do that ;)
Anyways, here's my translation:
STATEMENT: I get horrible back pain whenever I have to help a family member move.
TRANSLATION: (okay, we'll leave that one alone. pain is somewhat subjective)
S: It's so bad I can't even get out of bed at all for days or weeks at a time.
T: Okay, actually I can get out of bed, but I never thought you'd question me about
bed sores, infections, poor circulation or any other medical conditions that arise from being bed-ridden for long periods of time. It does hurt though to get out of bed, though, so that's gotta count for something, right? Half-credit? Please?
S: I can't drink or eat anything.
T: Well, yeah that makes no sense. I would have died from dehydration, but I didn't feel great and didn't *want* to eat or drink even though I actually did. Come on -- work with me here.
S: I think I might have broken my back one time.
T: NO! I did not go to the hospital! Why are you asking me these things? The fairies gave me some grape juice to drink & I was healed. Gosh! Don't you know anything?!
S: I nearly died.
T: No, I did not get any sort of medical attention for that -- the fairies! The fairies took care of me! You aren't even listening to me.
S: Finally, I gave into my wife's[or husband's] suggestion and ...
T: Alright, the Advil would have "cured" me all along b/c really it wasn't that bad but I had to do something to drag the story out for sympathy points. :)
S: It was worse than you could ever imagine.
T: It was better than you could ever imagine. You probably don't even remember the days when you could get rid of your pain with a couple doses of Advil. I could have said that, but I was going for dramatic effect. How'd I do?
Anyways, have fun & keep laughing. Keep it PG & we can keep the jokes, satire & silly stories going for a long time to come, I'm sure.
have a great day!
frances