Monday checkin

Here it is our Monday check in post, lol. I think many of us are in the middle of that artic blast that has dumped cold temps on places that are not usually this cold yet. It has hit Tx & I am ready for things to warm up. We had snow last night & it was just enough to cover roof tops & yards. It is melting off this morning.

Let us hear what everyone has planned for the week ahead.

It is really cold here in Illinois--near St. Louis, MO. We are having teens overnight and it was 20° at 6:30 this morning. It is snowing right now and we already got about 1.5 inches yesterday/last night.

As for my health...
I'm feeling a little down and I'm scared that I am going to have a relapse of what happened earlier in the month. I'm sticking to my plan and I am trying to keep busy. I just really wish my wife was supporting me and showing love. It hurts so much that she isn't showing any love towards me. We've been together almost 10 years and I am so used to having that loving person everyday to go to. We aren't separated or anything, but it seems like she is treating me more like a friend right now or even just a roommate. I just want to feel her love again and it is starting to make me feel very lonely.

I have an appointment with my PCP today at 2:30 and then my first appointment with a new therapist tomorrow at 3:30. So things are moving along but I just feel all alone in it. It makes me question whether she ever really loved me the way I love her. I don't think you can love a person more than I love her and there is no way in hell I would act the way she is if the situation was with her in my position. I guess I am one of those people that really like romantic things..ooohh I think the word for it is hopeless romantic. I just have sooo many racing thoughts through my head and not all negative but a lot of thoughts of some scary outcomes for especially my marriage.

Cold and snowy, but made it to my oncologist appointment despite the weather and actually got some good news. The appointment was a comparison between now and when I was first diagnosed. My cancer nodules are increasing in number, but not really in size, so that means growth is moderate overall and I might have a lifespan longer than the 6-month shortest prediction, though still pretty short of course.

My new palliative care doctor's massive increase in opiates and slight increase in neurontin has got the pain under the best control since this all started several months ago, with only very minor side effects (slight muscle weakness, some stuttering under stress but no brain fog, little bit of dizziness). Of course the cancer's worse, but it's all about palliative care right now, so less pain is the goal and a huge success.

The main problem is the mystery swelling in my stomach. The doctors can't figure it out. It's not fluid, so it can't be drained, and no medicine reduces it. It just keeps increasing week after week, until I look like Santa Claus and none of my old pants fit. But at least it doesn't cause a lot of pain and according to tests and CT scans, isn't harming the function of any internal organs.

I also started Xalkori on Friday, a targeted chemo drug for this kind of cancer that doesn't cure but might prevent the tumors from increasing for a few months, and haven't had any side effects to speak of, so it's too soon to know if it's controlling the tumors but I can keep on taking it to see if it works (at least for now, fingers crossed).

Hope others are able to find signs of hope even if things seem darker now, and that somewhere down the road your pain will decrease.

Very cold. Not at all ready for this weather. My brain still thinks we should be at the end of summer. Gotta catch it up!! But the little snow and ice is already trying to get me....nearly fell walking to my car today, kinda doing the very slow shuffling thing with my arms out, attempting to keep my balance. This may be the year I get some golf shoes or baseball cleats rather than winter boots.

This week...pretty typical for me. Lots of doc appts. Therapist today and then prosthodontist (who really upset me saying that the original plan of removing all my teeth and doing full implant system would likely not happen due to financial reasons) while my regular dentist had me under the impression that plan was pretty much my best option. Confused and frustrated. Otherwise, just the regular follow-up type stuff and more PT for my neck.

Hope you all have a good week!

Chart... my son has asthma and I know how expensive those inhalers can be. We found them cheapest at Costco... they were two for $25. I hope you are able to get it!

Markh, I'm so sorry to hear you're struggling with things with your wife. Maybe she just needs a little time? I don't know. I often worry about how my CP affects my husband. Maybe she's tiptoeing around you because of how you've been suffering lately? Have you talked to her about it?

JamesBW, I'm glad to hear that your pain is being controlled, and I hope the pills work for you and you are able to be around for a long time. ((((hugs))))

MMM, I'm so glad to hear you've been pain free! I'm so jealous, frankly ;-)

I had another nerve block yesterday - decided to go with the superior hypogastric, which I had last time, instead of the caudal. I don't think it worked, though. Last night before bed my pain was so bad I took two of my BT meds, which I don't generally do, but I have quite a bunch 'left over' this month.

I took my son to San Antonio this weekend, I owed him a trip. It was a business trip for me so I took him along and only had to pay for his flight. We went to the Alamo, took a ride on the river, and had fun hanging out in the hotel room (when you're 8, that's enough fun!)

That said, I'm paying for it body-pain wise BIG TIME. I was hoping the nerve block would give me some relief but so far it doesn't seem to have done the trick. I felt like it helped last time, but, I may have been wrong.

I did it with local anaesthesia and boy did it hurt ...

Linds thanks, the inhale of Xopenex I have and its about $40 at Krogers.
It's the Xopenex solution for Nebulizer that is needed, it stronger and helps so much better.
My many Thanks to you.

I did write a letter to the insurance company along with other medications I'm allergic to, even though the reaction I had was not life threatening, it could go that way with each try and then an er visit which I don't want or recommend.
I'm also very sensitive to advair diskus, which actually made me have an asthma flair...

White Beard keep us posted on this and I hope its not vein swelling..might be RA but I do not wish that on anyone. I have knee and foot swelling from RA and I know this because methotrexate treatments (when I'm on it) help and I have skinny knees...

MMM so glad to hear your pain free, hope that continues...

Backtolife. I hope you can get some mri's done to make sure nothing is getting worse. Worried about you. And hope the injection only needs a few days to work. Keep us posted on that...