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a kiss on the forehead?

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Posted 7/21/2015 5:23 AM (GMT 0)
My pain doctor went through the prep area of the surgery center and kissed all his patients on the forehead. Does this seems strange and out of line to anyone else?
Posted 7/21/2015 7:41 AM (GMT 0)
Not something I would normally see :)

I guess it depends on the individual relationships.

My pain doc prays with me and hugs me at appointments. He started it during and ICU stay, and now it just seems part of the appointment.

I know different cultures have ways of interacting with each other-is he a different ethnicity?
Posted 7/21/2015 9:30 AM (GMT 0)
Definitely seems out of line to me, unless a specific patient asked for it and he also agreed. The only time a doctor or nurse has ever touched me is to shake hands or do some specific medical test or procedure. Personally, I would find a kiss on the forehead degrading and inappropriate and stop the doctor before he could do it, or complain loudly if he did it too fast to stop.
Posted 7/21/2015 1:23 PM (GMT 0)
I'd feel especially cared for if my doctor gave me a little forehead kiss before surgery. A little unusual, but I'd take it with a smile. Lots of doctors at least take hold of a patient's hand before surgery and hold on a bit while reassuring the patient that all will be well.
Posted 7/22/2015 6:13 AM (GMT 0)
Thank You very much for your opinions. He is white american.
Posted 7/22/2015 6:36 AM (GMT 0)
Think it all depends. Not trying to get out of line or anything but was he foreign? Some cultures do it out of faith.
Posted 7/22/2015 10:14 AM (GMT 0)
It may just be a good luck kinda talisman for him and some surgeon's I have known or seen through the years have strange prep and pre-op protocols and stick to them and believe me some are really strange but hey if I am headed to surgery and the man with the scalpel believes it I'm in! As long as he's not singling out just one gender or age groups I am betting odds it's one of his quirky protocols for good luck. He should however make sure the person doesn't mind his space invaded although having any kind of surgery or procedure is about as up close and personal as it gets.
Posted 7/22/2015 2:01 PM (GMT 0)
Vickie wrote: "although having any kind of surgery or procedure is about as up close and personal as it gets."

I got to thinking more about this and I figured out why it would bother me. I expect my doctor to treat me as an equal most of the time, discussing treatments and potential outcomes as he would with a colleague rather than giving orders to me as if I was a child or a subordinant or a patient a few generations ago when doctors expected to have unquestioned authority.

There are some situations where he's superior--procedures where I have to lie there helplessly--and some where I'm superior--when I refuse the treatment plan he prefers for his reasons and choose another for my reasons and he can't legally stop me. But those aren't the norm. Mostly we're equals.

A kiss on the forehead is what a superior does to an inferior, parent to child, pet owner to pet. It's a demonstration that the doctor is not only going to be able to be in my space during surgery, as Vickie mentioned, but he's reveling in it and taking advantage of it. I don't expect he would dare to kiss a superior on the forehead before surgery, but in the days before concern about inappropriate touching though he might get away with kissing his lower ranking assistants.

I would distrust a doctor who used my temporary inferior situation to do something he wouldn't do to his colleague or boss. I agree that if the patient gives permission, no problem, but the doctor needs to get permission first. Though I wonder if asking "May I kiss you on the forehead?" would make him feel it wasn't worth it.
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