New member saying hello

I'm new here, so bare w/me. I was an RN & in 2003 fell down some concrete steps resulting today in 13 ruptured & bulging discs in my cervical & lumbar area, along w/TBI, spinal stenosis, DDD, neuropathy, radiculopathy, & progressive scoliosis. I have been to 3 different Pain Management doctors, have tried every non-invasive tx. that Worker's Comp would pay for & have had 7 surgeons tell me I needed a cervical & lumbar spinal fusion, which I have put off for yrs. I have had opioid-induced hyperalgesia twice, & been to the same 3mo. Pain Management in-house treatment center, feeling great coming out. I was able to take long walks & work w/a personal trainer; each time becoming worse after only a few mo. I am in constant pain every day w/2-3 wk. flare-ups. I have become w/drawn, isolated, angry, depressed & frustrated. I just don't know what to do anymore. I cannot find any motivation or joy & have completely lost my faith. I've never prayed for a cure, just the ability for me to cope w/my pain better. I see my 8th surgeon this Wed. & I'm terrified. I've told all the different surgeons I've seen that I will consider a spinal when I'm in a w/c. Now, the pain is so bad I'm unsure, but I can't walk far, do housework, etc, & am almost to the point of considering it. Then I realize I still want the least invasive of treatments or surgery. Thanks for listening to me ramble. Just helps to tell my story <3






I have given your post a heading so more people will see it. Thanks.

Post Edited By Moderator (straydog) : 7/19/2016 11:35:31 AM (GMT-6)

I hear you.

I will be in pain for the remainder of my life. I have stage 4 avascular necrosis of both hips due to prolonged use of glucocorticosteroids for Addison's disease.

When I consider the toll that unrelenting pain has had on my life I find that I lack the words that adequately express what I feel.

The best that I can do is to do the best that I can, each day, in my own way and in my own time.

I am grateful for a medical team that is responsive to me as a person and for a family that cares for me deeply. Without these connections, I would be lost.

With each surgery, there is risk. No surgery is guaranteed. Perhaps you are wise to continue the path of low medical intervention that you have adopted thus far.

For myself, I will not entertain any more surgery - even if critically necessary. No more. Never. My body is tired of the struggle to attain health that will never be mine.

I am sorry that you have to endure ongoing pain. One thing that gives me reason to carry on is knowing that my pain levels can and do vary. That perhaps tomorrow my pain may be slightly lower than it was today. I hope that your tomorrow is a tad brighter.
- Karen -

A sign at my first physical therapists' office read..."Pain is inevitable...Misery is optional."

I too am 'surgeried out'. As far as my shoulders are concerned, it wasn't me that made the decision. I've been told I am "not a surgical candidate". It is me, however, that made the decision on the wrist of my dominant hand. It's already had 3 surgeries to the back of it...not gonna bother with the carpal tunnel release.

I also walk the tightrope of alcohol recovery and a need for pain management.

You might want to contact your local Office on Aging. They may be able to get you into subsidized housing at a cost you can afford on SSI. Stress always makes my pain worse. Perhaps your own place will lessen some of your pain.

Hello Utah and welcome to our safe house where we all hear you!! I don't think that anyone here can't relate to many of your struggles and for some the struggles are many levels. I too am retired nurse,disabled out of work,battled the war on WC until that battle was nolonger productive and moved onto the fight for disability at 43. All the while dealing with alcoholic husband who thought I had problems and he didn't,5 kids and no support system until I stumbled upon HW in the wee hours of another sleepless night. That was 9 years ago. 6 surgerys later,too many Drs to recall them all,a divorce and all the kids now grown I have to say there were plenty of days during the 15 years I thought I could go no more.

With the support of the many here past and present,understanding,supporting,pushing me when I ran out of steam and just knowing that this place and these people were always here was a great comfort. I learned that no matter how bad my life got someone else had it worse.

It's difficult for others to understand the lengthy search for the right team of healthcare professionals and a team it takes. So much of healthcare now is speedy approaches and drs whom you rarely have time to say hello to must less discuss ongoing problems. Finding a team that works well together with you to accomplish a main goal is I think the hardest battle by far but once you have found it they are priceless.

Non-CPers can't understand the "no surgical" mindset many of us have taken but I know for me it's always going to be a last ditch effort certainly not my first defense. Only you know what is best for you and when.

Hi Utah.

So sorry you are suffering so bad. You are among friends here at HW. I was fortunite enough to find this site only about 2 months ago , but it has been a great help, with lots of people who care and offer
advice , support , the occasional chuckle, and a commonality that we all suffer from pain issues.

I have 4 compression fractured ( thou fully healed ) vertabrae, and a provisional diagnosis of arthritis. Like many at HW , I have mobility problems and depression , but I can honestly say that HW
has been a giant help for me. Information , encouragement , empathy , and lots more positive things occur when you join HW.

Anyway , I just wanted to welcome you here , and I hope you keep posting. Perhaps you might tell us how things go with your Wednesday appointment. If not , that is fine too.

Wishing you the very best;

Derwood.

Hello UtahNoni.Welcome to HW.

Wow,you really have some back problems that make mine look trivial.

We're all kind of broken in different ways here,but,we all have a great deal in common when it comes to dealing with Doctors,Meds,etc..

Again,welcome aboard the pain train.

Take care and God Speed.

Rick