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Pain medications #2 easiest for teens to access?

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Posted 8/30/2008 5:50 AM (GMT 0)
OK I am not pointing a finger on my darling step kids but..........

I have been missing meds for some time and putting 2+2 together.  Am I being paranoid? My 19yr old step son has spent the past two weekends with us,  I am not about to point a finger but... I know what I know.  My fault for not keeping my pain meds with me at all times.  Anyone??

Cloe

I think I should approach my step son alone without his father around.  I want answers.  He is such a darn good kid, good grades and all.  Hum..........

Posted 8/30/2008 6:27 AM (GMT 0)
Cloe:

I know that step-relationships are tricky, so I understand your desire to tread lightly here, but I guess I would caution you not to do so in this case. Your step son might indeed be a very fine young man, but that does not, unfortunately, make him immune to the pressures, temptations, and stresses of adolescence. Many young people who become addicts tell stories of their addictions starting with attempts to find ways to cope with long hours of study or the stresses of school and work. If you have any reason to suspect that someone you care about might be taking medications illegally, the ONLY thing to do (even though it's the hard thing to do) is to confront the issue. And in this case, you need to talk to his father too and share your concerns with him. Imagine if he really is taking the meds and you don't tell your husband and something were to happen.... And the reality is that anytime someone takes medications that are not prescribed to them or even prescribed medications taken differently from how they are directed, that person might be risking their life.

The very first thing you need to do, though, is put your medications into a locked container or safe of some sort that only you can access. You also need to do a pill count and start documenting exactly how many pills you've got. If you have a contract with your doc, you may need to be calling them as well. I am not sure they will be very sympathetic about the situation, but it is imperative that you be the one to bring it to their attention rather than having them "discover" a discrepancy at a pill count or drug test if you have those sort of checks at your office. You want to be sure to avoid any appearance of diversion here. Form what I understand, if the doctors find evidence diversion or abuse, they are within their rights to terminate care.

This is a scary situation, and not a fun one to navigate. Let us know how it goes. I hope for your step son's sake that there is another explanation here.
Ry
Posted 8/30/2008 7:44 AM (GMT 0)
If it was me I would make absolutly sure before I said anything.I agree with ryand that you should keep a super tight tally on your locked up meds when this kid is around.Maybe start a conversation about how much extra pain you go through whenever the druggist makes a sloppy count and explain how much CP'ers suffer when counting mistakes are made.Kind of feel him out abit.I agree with ryand that it's more than possible that young people can get caught up in prescription drug use but I would be afraid of alienating a new step kid IF and it's a big IF it turned out that he's totally innocent.An accusation, once made is near impossible to take back.Please make sure of your facts.I know that I've taken an extra pill or two during a rough spot and had to have my wife remind me of it the next time I do a pill count and find it short.Is it possible that the drug store could be making these shortages?Hope things work out.Take care and God Bless............Rod
Posted 8/30/2008 7:52 AM (GMT 0)
Rod:

Just to clarify... I agree with you that one should be very careful before making an accusation. I probably wasn't very clear about that. What I was trying to say is that Cloe needs to talk to her husband NOW and share her concerns about the pill counts right away. He needs to be aware of what's happening so that if, heaven forbid, his son is taking these meds, they can tackle the issue together. Sorry that was fuzzy... blush

Ry
Posted 8/30/2008 5:57 PM (GMT 0)
Cloe,
I don't have much energy for a lengthy response, but I would agree with the advice you've been given. I have a hunch you have some good evidence or you wouldn't have written this post, but it's true if there's another possible explanation to rule that out. But I really commend you on not putting your head in the sand, either. Often teens just want to sample something (haven't many of us been there maybe with a beer or a cigarette or more?) and if that's the case you do want to catch it early. Kids can also know how much this stuff is worth on the street, and maybe want to make a little quick money. So it's good that you're taking some action. It's lousy when pain meds have to be locked up in our own home. Honestly, I have enough trouble keeping track of what I've taken; if I had to lock it up?

Let us know how it goes.

PaLady
Posted 8/30/2008 8:29 PM (GMT 0)

I'm sorry to hear of your issues and wanted to share why we recently bought a safe.  I am the only one that has access to the combination...I put all the meds in it that could potentially be abused.  The day we bought it, I sat down w/ my 13 yr old boy and explained that i was going to keep his adderall in there also and dole it out in a pill case 1 week at a time.  I told him that it had absolutely nothing to do with trust.  I trust him and I love his friends...but, peer pressure is what it is and I, for one, don't want to end up in a lawsuit b/c someone decided to have sticky fingers.  Please note, we've never had an issue, never had stuff missing...it was just a safeguard that we wanted to employ in our home since he's getting older.  He was cool w/ my explanation and, "got it" once I spelled it out to him.  Effective communication is the key.  Best of luck to you!

--k

Posted 8/31/2008 2:53 AM (GMT 0)

Hello Cloe,

I just want to dito what everyone else said and give a brief history, my daughter is a recovering herion addict and I would have never thought she would have gotten into all that, I have raised my kids to be stong and to be leaders and not followers and how dangerous that route is.  I even have a brother who still is heavy into all drugs and has been sence he was 13 and he is now 34. My daughter was a straight A student in all honors classes and a great child with a loving heart.  She dropped out of school at the end of 10th and still hasnt not got her GED.  She is 18 now. 

My daughters started off on pain pills she got from a firends house and it went from there and it went fast.  Some people have very additive personalities.  I dont know how much you know about prescribtion pill and kids.  But it is so bad.  Street value for one perc is about 10$ and they are rampit in the schools along with pot, coke, and meth or herion.

I do agree that you should make sure you have proff because once you cross that line there is no turning  back.  With that said , I say trust your instints, they usu. are right, and talk with your husband about your concerns a united front is always better. Not only is it better it is ness.  You to need to be on the same page because if and thats IF he did take then you to need to be together on how to deal with it.  One thing that I have learned is that when one parent doesnt see or believe that there child would do that, that then leaves open the door for your step son to play both sides agaist each other.  That in turn will cause problems with you are your husband as well as distroy trust between you to.

I was not with my daughter father when she got into all this, and her father did not want to believe me so when I told him about it he let her move out there with him and she got into even more trouble out there and her drug prob got worse becuse he just refused to deal with it.  He was like no, not my sweet baby.

I can understand you step son may be a good child and does well is school but at the end of the day as Ry said these kids today are under so much pressure to achieve so much more than we ever were and to be the best at it as well... There is no time for them just to be kids any more....I dont know if your aware of this but teen sucide is the highest it ever has been, drug use is a high as it has ever been  with teens and young adults.  They are looking for anything they can to stay on TOP of all that is thrown at them and so many are starting to crack under all the pressure.

Without you and your husband being on the same page is can cause so much more damage in the long run than you realize.  No one and I mean, NO one wants to believe there child would do such a thing but it happens so much and to many GOOD and LOVING parents. If he is into it he will need both of you to get the help he needs and lots of love and support. 

You diffently need to get a safe for you meds.  With any kids in the house and potent drugs they should be locked up.  I know I never thought of it myself intil my daughter came back to live with me.  I should have done it along time ago because you just never know.  I know I have went to take my pills  and got disctracted, door, kids fighting, exc. and left them on the counter.  All it takes is one. 

Just one more thing I want to say, I hope you no this is not your fault if he did take them.  He is old enough to make his own decissions, and knows the difference between right and wrong.  The worse thing is for you to assign blame to yourself. It does not help anything to carry that blaim and it wil in the long run make things worse if he did take them.  Guilt is a usless emotion and it only cause harm and not good.  I only say that because as parents and step parents we always take that on ourselves.  The what ifs.  I know I did and it causes so much more harm for both me and my daughter. I couldnt even help her the way I needed to because I was to busy trying to make things better for what I thought was my failure.  It took me many yrs to stop blaiming myslef and stop bailing her out all the time becuase of that quilt.  I made it so much harder for her to get clean because of my quilt.

I wish you luck with whatever you deciede to do and at the end of the day it is your decission to handle this the best way you think.  I just offer up my experiences.  I will pray for you and your family Cloe and if you need anything at all please fell free to email at any time.  This is never any easy sitution to aproach and I really do feel for you and can empathize so deeply.

lara

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