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Monday was a sad day.

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Posted 9/16/2009 1:17 PM (GMT 0)
Monday I said good bye to a friend, and I guess I have been too numb the last day or two to realize how empty everything seems right now.

No, no one died. My friend was my camper. A sweet little pop up tent camper that we bought last year and had a lot of family fun in both going camping at the state parks and just "camping" in out in the drive way.
(My 4 year old cried as it was pulled away)

Between my back which is getting worse, the diabetic nueropathy in my legs, and not having any real pain meds/management it was just getting too hard on me to set it up and take it down for our camping trips. I could do it, and I could still do it in only 15-20 minutes, but it left me hurting and irritable for hours to days making the trip a lot less fun for everyone so I put it up for sale and someone bought it and hauled it off Monday afternoon.

I really am not a very materialistic person, and in reflection it was not the camper itself that I loved as much the joys that came with it. Camping is something that my wife, kid, myself and even our dogs loved to do. Now with it gone the "opportunity" to go is gone with it for the time being even though the reality of going has never been that good between my issues and the wife's work and school schedules.

Oh well. Not to fret too much. All is not totally lost as we are going to be getting a travel trailer as soon as possible. If all goes remotely right by mid to late spring next year we will have one, if not sooner. Just have to put together a little more money and then find the right deal.

It also does help a little that the person who bought my little friend seemed very excited to be getting it and was very appreciative about how nice it really was considering it was a 16 year old, all original (except for the tires) camper. Pretty rare to find one that old with the original canvas, floor, upholstery, etc. in good shape. So I think it went to a good home.
Posted 9/16/2009 4:44 PM (GMT 0)

What are you taking for your pain ?

Can your pain worser in different types of weather ?

I feel alot of my pain is weather related and goes by the temperature.

I'm glad you are going to still go traveling but a different way.

It is something the family looks forward to doing with you and a happy time of your lives.

Posted 9/16/2009 8:28 PM (GMT 0)
Wow Jim,
sorry you had to give up the pop up trailer, but sounds like you've got good plans for travel trailer and I hope you can get it...
sounds like it went to a good home...
please look into getting another pain management doctor if your current one is not helping...
Lots and lots of soft hugz...
Posted 9/16/2009 8:49 PM (GMT 0)
Jim,
I have to echo Chartreux's thoughts - especially about getting a better pm doctor. Hopefully, you can do that before next spring, so that way you can have more positive experiences with your family, even if it's camping in the back yard.

I know what it feels like to have to "say good-bye" to things we used to do. The losses that need to be grieved. I'm glad you posted this because you're right, even though a person didn't die, it's a type of death nonetheless. A little like what fatherjohn was talking about in his post.

So allow yourself to grieve some, but maybe with your 4 year old you can come up with some creative ways to even "camp" inside the house. Like maybe turn all the lights out, make a little cooking fire in the backyard (or eat cold baked beans out of a can!), put up a little "tent" over a bed (just using a sheet - a 4 year old can get really creative!).

Anyway, for today, hugs coming your way to soothe your loss.

PaLady
Posted 9/16/2009 10:03 PM (GMT 0)
Jim

I to am glad you posted this! You know it is these little things that we have to give up that really seem to add up, and as trivial as it might seem to some, ( at least at first)  these thing have allot of meaning to us. And there is a certain amount of hurt and sadness that goes with having to give these things up! Not to mention maybe a hint of guilt about not being abe to meet the expectations that we think we should especially when we are thinking about our little ones!   You know it is all part of of this beast called CP!!!!

 Thanks for sharing this with us Jim!  I do wish you and your family well!

White Beard

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