I blew it

The first really good day in a long time, and I go and blow it. Why do I always do this to myself?

I was getting so good at pacing, then my ankle sprain set things back. Today my papers for my ex-employers long term disability come, and my doctors have marked it unable to function. What a let down. So I keep going anyway, getting stubborn and doing things by myself. Now I am on enforced rest until the pain calms down.

I am my own worst enemy some days.

Oh Mom... *hugs* I know all to well how easy it is to go out and "wreck" myself and put myself outta comission by being stubborn or determined to see something through without pacing myself or asking for help ... usually it's a result of someone ruffling my feathers. Can't be there for me, fine, I'll just do it myself! becomes my attitude, and you'd think by now I'd realize that's a very destructive mentality to have and that I need to leave it by the wayside. It's hard though. You want to feel productive and feel like you've accomplished something, that life is continuging to go forward instead of feeling stuck in limbo.

I hope you feel better soon. Hopefully you can find something positive to focus on next time, or another outlet instead of beating yourself up.

Mindy... go pick up that crochet hook!! Work on the plans for your wedding, go look at flowers, taste cakes, in a few more months the bridal expo's should be starting; make plans to attend one. Go to the mall and let one of the girls at the makeup counter give you a lil make over, get ideas for that magical date set to come. That way you can feel like you've accomplished something, but done something uplifting at the same time. 

I'm still hoping to see some pictures of your beautiful work, and tomorrow I'll be getting to the yarn shop, while today I should be able to get out and look at fabric.

Jim, I answered phones to schedule radiology appointments and get their demographics and insurance information.

I am in school to type doctor's transcription from home and he encouraged me to finish, but doesn't think I will be able to do it.

I haven't given up yet, just don't know how to get past it at this point. My last surgery in February 2011 made things worse instead of better at this point.

Rhaevin,
I can't drive and am a Mary Kay Makeup and skin care consultant, sort of. I do the makeovers! I have been crocheting like mad. I got 2 silk shawls done in 5 weeks. Wedding planning is done and paid for. I have left myself with next to nothing to do! Pity party day needs to end!

Now Mindy just because you made all your plans doesn't mean you can't go have fun regardless. Maybe you'll get some great ideas that you'll be able to share with a friend when it's her turn, or get some ideas last minute for some changes you want to make that are minor. And everyone always has time to taste cake samples!

I'll be getting to the yarn store tomorrow on my way back from visiting with my surgeon. Didn't find the fabric today I was hoping too, so my Mom and I are planning a pilgramidge to the little local quilt store as she always has a good supply of the type of fabric I want. Let's hope she's got what I'm looking for! Maybe this is what I need to get that swift kick to get my own projects jump started again; after all I still have a barely started scarf staring at me from my loom. My hands just haven't been willing to work lately.

As for the make-over.... is there a friend who can try out some stuff for you? It's always different when you let someone else play around. Or maybe just go for a spa treatment; I love those massage chairs while my toes soak in the jacuzzi tubs.

*hugs* Chin up!

Dani,
I am doing better now. My niece came over and is spending the night tonight. She helped me make the pies for our church fundraising dinner that is this Saturday. She helped so much. I haven't seen her in so long, and her presence was more the therapy I needed to feel better than her actual help with the pies.

I too will strive to take small breaks when doing big tasks to keep myself from over doing it as often. I am thinking of getting a watch with at timer. This way, I can set it for a specific amount of time depending on the activity level of the task to remind myself to break for a while.

How are you feeling dear? What did the doctors say? You said you struggle with this too, and are you making any progress?
You know me too well when you say I like to be productive! If I had to list my weaknesses, that would be in capital letters at the top surrounded with exclamation points! Productivity is a good thing but not when taken so far that it jeopardizes your health or the health of others.

Hope you are doing well tonight, and thank you for the gentle reminder and encouragement.
Mindy