Current Update on Wife

The other thread was getting long and buried, so thought I would start a fresh one with today's update:

SATURDAY EVENING UPDATE

This is day 8 of her ordeal. Only slight improvements, but no backward steps, or no more slips or falls.
After a week of bed side "bathing", finally was able to help her safely into the real shower, it was driving her nuts that she couldn't wash her long red hair. Her pain gets worse from about 4pm progressively later in the evening. Her worses times are around midnight for some reason.

She is suppose to go back to work Monday, but barring some miracle, there's no way she is going to be ready in any sense of the word, being that tommorow is Sunday. She is not scheduled for a 2nd followup visit to her doctor until Wednesday, so not sure how all of this is going to work out.

Me - still a lot of pain from my normal pain, added to with all the extra physical work involved in her care (not complaining, just stating). Same troubles with eating and digesting food, but still have that visit coming up in 10 days with some super gastro dr in spartanburg, if i can make it that long.

today, my youngest son volunteered his day off, to help me go fetch our RV from storage at the RV park on the lake. We had to fix a flat before leaving the campground (knew it was there), and we safely got it home and parked in the back yard. Had to pay 250 bucks in storage fees for the summer, and never used it even once. cant afford to have it there all winter. glad he was there, between cranking the trailer up and down on the hitch twice, and changing the wheel, more jacking, his strength came in handy.

fixed an all day pot of 15 bean soup with andoullie sausage for one and all, seemed to be a big hit.

we are trying hard to get my wife mended, its just taking longer than she expected, and she is starting to reach that impatient point.

david

Jane,

No, doesn't work that way in the US. She has accumulated a bunch of PTO hours (Paid Time Off). THey can be used for holiday pay, sick pay, vacation pay, etc. As long as she is using her PTO time, she gets paid, once it runs out, you are on your own. She does have LTD (Long Term Disability) policy, but she's a long way from reaching the criteria for using that policy. Hope it doesn't reach that point.

Pretty sure she will heal from this, but this is already her 2nd bout of this ailment in 2 years, this time way much worse. Really hoping it doesn't become a chronic situation for her. We don't need two of us in the family both on Disability. I am thank for my Social Security Disabilty and Medicare health insurance, I worked hard for 42 years paying into the US system for these benefits, but it only pays me at most, 40% of what I was making when I was able to work.

Dr. didnt seemed inclined to order a new MRI, as they did one when she had this problem 2 years ago. MRI's won't show up nerve damage anyway, and they don't feel its an orthopedic type problem.

As been the case this week, as I write, she is now back in the severe pain zone, seems to hit her about 9-10 PM at night, even though she had a pretty good day.

Right now, aside from pain meds, we are trying a topical pain cream, plus a moist heat pad, that you put in the microwave for 3 minutes at the time. At midnight, she can take some more serious pain meds, to hopefully get her through the night.

THanks for your good thoughts and ideas.

david

thanks, we are not agains that thinking, but the NP she saw this past Monday thought it would be a waste of time, will have to see what the current thinking is Wednesday if she is not better.

david

Thanks for the update David. On both of you. The other thread was getting a bit too long for me to read.

Guess that's all I can say. You guys know what you are doing and hopefully everything with her back will get better soon. Take care!!

Maryann

I have been in similar shoes. My (now ex) wife had gastric bypass surgery that went into serious complications. I was on PM at the time, thankfully, but I was primary caregiver, when I wasn't working. My mother-in-law spent the days with her. That woman is a saint.

Anyway, the wife developed serious neuro problems, that caused her to become bedridden, then have to learn to walk again as her strength came back. She eventually recovered to about 90%.

All of that to say that it takes a special person to care for another as you are doing now. I know she appreciates it, even if she may not say it at the time if she has other things on her mind. We all appreciate the kind of guy you are being in helping her, while dealing with your own issues.

You, my friend, are a real man. And I wish you and your wife the best.

susie - i fully agree with you. this particular NP was just plain rude and uncaring, in her entire approach. i agree too, that a MRI for a similar ailment is too old to assume that nothing has changed. Unfortunately, last Monday, her regular PCP wasn't there, she didn't have an appointment, she was still in severe pain 2 days after the ER visit, so they had to fit her in, and only this NP was available. And her entire interest, was to make sure that my wife didn't get any more serious pain med. She did nothing to really look into the source of the pain, or offer any useful suggestions. The only thing she really did was to give my wife her "out of work pass for the week". And set her up with a followup appt. if needed this coming Wednesday.

My wife texted her PCP today, and it seemed to annoy the dr. She said she doesn't do Monday, that she should call the practice in the morning and see if they can fit her in, she said it didn't matter what doctor she saw. This really annoyed my wife even more, because she is friends with this particular dr, and she thought she was treated pretty cold.

Against my advice, she has a friend her's husband is a chiro, and he came to the house with his table, and spent about 15 minutes. He used some tool that looked like a stapler and punched down a bunch of times down her spine in different places. I will be honest, I have a natural distrust of the entire chiro practice in general. They are not doctors, and I would never use one. No offense to anyone that does believe in them. He showed me some pressure exercise I could do on her. I don't think he did anything to hurt her or make things worse. It as a quick 25 bucks he made, and he's already wanting to come back tommorow.

If a real doctor reccomended that she see a chiro, I would be more confident about the whole thing. Perhaps its jsut a hangup with me. I am a big believer in the real medical world, and not into alternative treatments, at least not for my own use.

She still hasn't had even one good day yet. Today was a little better than Saturday. Saturday was a bit better than Friday. I do not feel she can be at work in a stressful and physical job. Afraid she would get there, and within an hour or two, need to be taken back home. I would rather she see a real doctor, perhaps have new scans done, to make sure there is nothing serious underneath the pain, and get a true medical clearance before going back to work. I am just cautious like that, especially with my complex medical history.

Thanks,

David

she can barely walk a lap inside a medium sized house without being in pain, while using a cane. I don't need convincing on my end. Yes, she is very stubborn like that. The morning will be interesting.

david

David,

I'm so happy that you and your wife were able to see a good doc who is on top of things! Hopefully with the new meds she'll be feeling better soon! I'm also relieved to hear that she is going to have an MRI, as it seems pretty clear that something fairly serious is going on, and back issues aren't anything to fool around with!

I'm sorry to hear that you aren't feeling so well! I can only imagine how tough it's been for you -- both physically and emotionally -- this last week. Hang in there! Hopefully with your wife feeling better on the new meds you'll be able to catch a bit of a break. You and your wife have both been in my thoughts and prayers recently, and will continue to be so!

Skeye

Thank you, one and all.

She just took her first valium, super dose of Tramadol, and a 800 mg Advil. Hoping she will be out like a light soon. I rubbed icy hot all over her hurt area, putting as much pressure as she desired. Just fed her a snack of cheese and ritz crackers (One of her fave) to keep away any nausea. Earlier, we tried an ice pack, but it ended up bothering her too much. In the morning, she starts the mega doses of Prednesone.
Hoping in 24 hours from now, to see some signs of improvement.

Still dont know when the MRi will be done, they never called back today. The imaging center though, is only 4 blocks from our house, so we can get there fast when the time comes.

It's been a long 10 days since this ordeal started. It's been tough on both of us, especially for her, as she is not accustomed to dealing with any long lasting pain. But so thankful, by providence, that we fell into such an in-tune and caring doctor this time. She was preaching to the choir with us this morning. It was a good step in the right direction, which she had seen her a week ago instead of that ghastly NP. That was just a waste of a week in reality. But it is what it is.

David

Hi David, I am just tickled pink, over your news that your wife seen that new doctor and is getting an MRI done, and above all is getting some proper pain treatment!  It sounds like you guys have hit a home run with getting this new doctor! And if your wife has to stay home another two weeks so be it! Better she be at home and get healed up than to be at work and possibly make it worse! 

 

You know David I am kind of with you about chiropractors, and it seems all they ever want you to do is come back for more treatments! And that can be expensive! I am sure they help some people, and I guess they do have their place, but personally I will never go to one again, with the shape my back is in, to be frank, I am scared to go to one!

 

I guess I lucked out, David I seen the neurosurgeon this afternoon and since my MRI was done last January, he wants a new MRI and flexion X-rays of my lower back, they got the appointment made for me before I ever left his office. I go the 16th and have the X-rays and MRI done, and then I see the neurosurgeon two hours later, and he will go over everything with me and see if he can do anything to help me. Oh and this time I am having my MRI in a new open MRI machine. I had problems the last few times when I have had them with over heating, so they said they just got this new open MRI machine and they would have me get mine done in it!

 

Well David it sounds to me like you have received some really good news today, but you know I must say, I have to agree with Kaely, with everything that you have going on with you, it really would be good for you to have some help. I am sure Kaely, as well as my self and everyone here, worrys about you, and we all want the very best for you and your wife and family. Just something to think about!

 

Wishing you the best my friend..........White Beard

dr gave it to her specifically for the leg spasms, said it was a great drug for that use, as a secondary purpose

call me a fool, but i depend on the real medical community - not into chiros, accupunture, eastern arts, weird herbs, etc. i turst our medical systems, not perfect, but i trust it for my very life.

kids that are nearby, my sons, just too busy - my oldest in enginnering college, his wife a busy nurse, and 2 grand kids - has his hands full. youngest son - manages a busy resturant 6 days a week. they would help, and they do when they can, but they have busy lives.

i am busting my tail, but still keeping up with caring for wife, and the house, etc etc. yesterday was terrible day for me, but today pain levels were more my "normal", whatever that means.

hoping my wife will have her first better night tonight

david

Rose,

Having spent 30 plus years in accounting and finance, I am OCD about numbers, lol. With all the new meds, i quickly set up an Excel spread sheet with all her meds, times, grids, etc. So that all she has to do is take the med and check it off on the spreadsheet. Even though she is a nurse and well versed in dispensing meds, anyone can make a mistake when they are down like she is.

She appears to be sleeping well at midnight, last night at this time - she was at pain levels 8-10 most of the night.

Can't wait for her MRI, hope it rules in or out clearly. Like her new doc says, she either has a very angry sciatic nerve - if so, the super meds will take hold, or this is some underlying reason that the nerve is so pinched or damaged - if so, then what kind of treatment plan.

It's been hard on us, but we are two swans, and we stick together as a team. I am doing everything and everything to make this ordeal more bearable for her. I am use to my ordeal of pain and cancer, she's not use to this. I will sacrifice some of my time, pain, tiredness, if it means she can get better quicker. I am not going to be healed in my situation, I just have to bear it. So it just makes me push harder to make it better for her.

david

So very sorry your wife had a bad night. Hope you can get the mri, soon. Maybe call the mri place and seeif they have recieved the doctors order for it. Hope your both doing better soon.
Many more prayers...