Newbe with Somatoform Disorder

Hi,

I am new here, my Phyc thought a forum may help me. I am looking for anyone who is going through any close to what is happen to me so that i know i am not alone.

I suffer extreme PTSD, anxity disorders, panic disorders, anger issues, depression, and a host of other mental problems that have taken their toll on me. This toll is not only mental, but physical. unlike anyone else in my therapy sessions, all my issues come with a physical manifestation. For the most part. Chronic widespread pain. Pain that on occasions have left me bed ridden. Meds dont always work and i quickly build a tolerance for them and have to come off before i go over the edge.

But there is more, Not only does all my disorders trigger physical pain, there are times when ANY emotion I have can trigger instant Pain. Happiness, sadness, laughter, or just seeing something cute on YouTube can bring me to my knees in pain. I often just shut down everything so the pain goes aways. My wife hates this and call me Living Dead. 

Can anyone relate to any of this?

Please. I'm almost done and dont think I can live this way anymore. I would like to be able to feel again.

Would you believe that I was worse and had to spen time in an "In Patiant" hospital.

Thanks

Hello Old Soldier & welcome to the chronic pain forum. I am not the person either that has your condition or anything close to it. I have not ever heard of this before & really cannot imagine what it is like for you. Pain on the other hand is something I can relate too.

As Abilene said some of us use more than one forum here at Healing Well. In addition to the depression forum we also have an anxiety forum so you may want to check them out. Both forums have some very nice folks over there.

Anyway, I wanted to pop on & say hello & welcome aboard.

Welcome Old Soldier. Is somatoform disorder the same - or at least similar to - conversion disorder? Just wondering as a girl I was at school with suffers from CD & recently spoke out on a TV programming here along with a couple of others with the aim of raising awareness. Can't recall whether they mentioned any particular resources or support forums, but perhaps you (or your wife - as some of it was quite distressing to watch and would guess from what you've said it would potentially be a trigger for your own episodes?) might want to look it up... It was a program called The Feed on SBS 2 Australia.

Laura

I can only relate to you, mostly because ... I worry and wonder should I even try to say what I want I hope this comes out right AND does not cause pain.
My father was never around as a kid and he passed when I was 17. He wasn't around I figured because he was just another dead beat dad. Then I started ( he was gone and the anger was a burden to me) to try to forgive him. I took all I knew and started looking at him without judgement. He came home from Vietnam and divorced then married my mother. The relationship quickly went bad and all his subsequent relationships went bad. I realized he was suffering what back then no one cared about , PTSD . He had a pritty bad case. I have spoken with other who came home the same. He chose high risk jobs , fire , police, fire etc. I didn't have a dad , I had a soldier. And now I am ok with that. I am proud so very proud of him. I love him through the horror stories of things he had done. He didn't do it. PTSD did. I feel for you and I am here for you. We all are. I can say for myself this forum has helped. I have depression that triggers pain also. And I can relate to the any emotion causes pain. I get that too. Even great news yippee will give me a migrane later. I can relate on many levels to you. I truly truly hope you start to feel better. Words here cannot truly tell you how much I mean that. I know it's hard for you to talk sometimes because the ptsd somehow blocks the flow of emotions and reroutes it into another part of you causing you problems. I just want you to know the daughter of a ptsd Vietnam vet is here to listen and care , love maybe , to you. ((((((((((((((Hug))))))))))))
Do let us know how you are feeling, you will find that posting here is healing. I know what your going through the anxiety and even the anger. For myself it's rage. I don't have a meter like regular folks it's 0- rage in .009 seconds for me. But posting here and everywhere ( I'm all over these forums) helps me.