Crohn's and sadness

Does anyone experience bouts of sadness that they feel could be connected to their Crohn's? I have been feeling sad lately and crying for no reason - one possibility is that I am dealing with a lot of stress in my life right now (I should clarify - nothing unmanageable, just don't feel strong enough to deal with it now, i.e. job stress (probably the most stressful), roommate stress, etc) and have found myself feeling very blue. Also, this is the first Winter since I was diagnosed 4 years ago that I haven't had a bad flare in the cold months. So it could be I am waiting for that to happen and it's making me anxious but I recognize it is not normal to be teary a lot of the time some days, and even in PUBLIC now! Like walking down a busy city street with tears streaming down my face! The poor people passing me must think i'm a lunatic. :) But I have gone from not crying often a few months ago to now crying everyday and even waking up sad. :(

But I have friends who have all kinds of thoughts on this and thought I'd ask some of you. Do any of you get sad during the Winter and do you think it has anything to do with bringing on a flare? My stomach is starting to get that slight ache and it's making me nervous. I have also strayed from my vegan diet which was doing wonders before - but I was so sick I would do anything to dedicate myself to getting well - then once I am well, it's easy to go back to living a "normal" life and eat a rich diet and drink wine and have the occasional cigarette - TERRIBLE i know. No one needs to make me feel bad about that because I am doing quite a job beating myself up over it already.

I am going to Florida next month and am hoping that some sunny weather and vitamin D will help set me right again. I know that a lot of anxiety and emotions are held in the intestines so it could be that, or it could be I have a touch of Seasonal Affective Disorder from lack of sunshine, or it could be I am afraid of getting sick, or it could just be unrelated to Crohn's and just the way I am.

Thoughts? Do any of you notice that this happens to you as someone with Crohn's/UC more often than someone who doesn't have this?

Thank you for listening. It really is very therapeutic to get this out. (I am also taking Clonopin for anxiety and just started seeing a therapist. :)

I have a suggestion stop beating yourself up over wanting to have a normal life.
I think it is pretty common to have some depression/anxiety issues with this disease.

Ok that might not have come off as meant, and please do note that I said wanting a normal life (as in a healthy life, that you do not have to be concerned about dealing with this disease, and that it is ok that you eat, drink, and have an occassional cig, because you yourself said you were beating yourself up about completely normal behavior).  I am not judgeing here, I am asking you be a bit more gentle with yourself (as in not beat yourself up about it) about the whole diet issue. 

Because from what I understood (and could be completely wrong) is that you feel like you are crying because you are concerned that you are getting sick or might be getting sick?

Of course I do not think crying and sadness is normal for anyone, but depression due to medical illness is very common, because one wants to be normal and healthy.

Of course there can be physical issues that contribute to these symptoms, some to numberous to list.  Vitimens def, thyriod, pain are just a few.

"I was wondering if having Crohn's makes you a little more emotional than the average person"

Yes! (as does any illness, pain, etc.)

I absolutely think Crohn's affects you emotionally! Heck, it affects me emotionally and I don't have Crohn's. My husband has Crohn's. When he was first diagnosed, Crohn's colored everything - every single day and every single moment was identified with how it is affected by Crohn's, not by the day or moment itself. Found myself crying even when things were ok for the most part, completely unable to enjoy anything in life.

It has been very challenging for me to accept the diagnosis of Crohn's, and even more challenging for me to accept that sometimes my husband is just going to be sick, uncomfortable and hurting. I saw all the limitations that having crohn's put on our lives, and saw life as an endless stream of suffering, jumping from one bad moment to another, and just couldn't focus on the times in between when life is good. Talk about despair!

I have been to therapy, and I take lexapro, and I have xanax for when my anxiety is too much for me to handle. As you can see, just therapy alone didn't cut it for me. The meds have made it much easier for me to be rational, or at least be aware of when I am not rational.

Have you considered seeing a therapist and maybe taking an anti-depressant? I don't know how my husband does it - he is stoic and accepts the changes in our lives and in his health with amazing grace. I wish I could do that, but we are all different, and I needed help. And getting on an anti-depressant was the best thing I've done to cope.

I hope you get to a better emotional state. ((Hugs))
PV

Thank you so much for all your kind words. I don't know why this is happening. I feel like I have no control over my emotions and it's like PMS times 100. I am not sad about anything specific, so maybe it's chemical, I have no idea. I have a friend who has SAD and the way she explained it sounds a lot like what I am feeling. I am just hoping I am not falling into a bout of depression. I think a lot of it has to do with my job and I am getting very stressed about money. When I am feeling strong (mentally, physically, emotionally) I can do anything I want and succeed at my job and manage all aspects of my life - then when I am feeling mentally weak it's like my whole body is shutting down.

I am going to Florida in a few weeks so hopefully a bit of sunshine and fresh air will help. :) Thank you all for your input. I have always been a little sensitive but the fact that I have intestines that don't behave themselves makes me a little more susceptible to being overly emotional.

Hi wednesday77,

I can relate to your emotional state. I think it may be worth doing some research into SAD & also to check your Vit D levels. Personally for me, i suddenly started to get over emotional about everything, i would either want to burst out crying or i would become very angry and agitated with people for no major reason. This was a gradual thing for me when i look back on it but last year it just got out of hand. I would be watching TV - and get a lump in my throat and just need to cry, i could be driving my car and just get a wave of emotion & need to cry....the list goes on, the silliest things could trigger it. For me it was not seasonal as i actually love the winter time. My crohns is not debilatating (thank god) so it wasn't due to my quality of life (that's not to say that it doesn't get me down alot). I also have alot of stress in my job but none of these were bad enough to be causing this extreme emotional sensitivity.

Like you i have always been a sensitive person, and all my stress or negativity goes straight to my gut - maybe it's stress that triggered the disease for me in the first place - who knows! But my GP decided to try me on anti depressants. I tried a few and didn't feel they suited me - then i tried Lexapro (5mg per day - i think that's the lowest dosage) and it has been a blessing to me. No i don't feel any happier as i don't believe i was depressed as such, but the uncontrollable over-emotional feelings, the crying at the flick of a switch, & the agitation has all subsided with the Lexapro. I feel alot stronger as i can control my emotions now and i have more power when it comes to my reactions to various things. I can manage to stay calm and not spend hours on end stressing over the silliest of things.

This is just my situation - hopefully it's of some use to you. I completely understand what you are trying to say about being a happy person in general and that you're not sad about anything specific but still get that PMSx100 feeling out of the blue. Hopefully your trip to Florida will help but if not i would strongly advise discussing anti depressants with your GP. There's no harm in trying, and if they don't help then at least you can say you gave it a shot.

Best of luck with everything & enjoy Florida

Lila

S.A.D? Worth looking into. I find that I feel better in the winter lately when I turn on bright lights when I get home. Aside from that your feelings are VERY understandable.

It sounds like depression to me. I have gone through the same thing. Of course, it's totally worth having your Vit D levels, etc checked, but when I read your post it just smacked of real, true depression. It's very common for people with chronic illness to suffer depression because of the constant fluctuations in health that they go through. I would speak with your doctor and explain how you are feeling and see what (s)he suggests. Maybe an anti-depressant would be a help? Even if it's just for 6 months or so. Whatever the case, I'm sorry you're going through this and I hope you feel better soon. (((HUGS)))

LiLa said...
Hi wednesday77,

I can relate to your emotional state. I think it may be worth doing some research into SAD & also to check your Vit D levels. Personally for me, i suddenly started to get over emotional about everything, i would either want to burst out crying or i would become very angry and agitated with people for no major reason. This was a gradual thing for me when i look back on it but last year it just got out of hand. I would be watching TV - and get a lump in my throat and just need to cry, i could be driving my car and just get a wave of emotion & need to cry....the list goes on, the silliest things could trigger it. For me it was not seasonal as i actually love the winter time. My crohns is not debilatating (thank god) so it wasn't due to my quality of life (that's not to say that it doesn't get me down alot). I also have alot of stress in my job but none of these were bad enough to be causing this extreme emotional sensitivity.

Thank you everyone and especially LiLa, THAT is how I feel! I am not sick and am having zero symptoms of Crohn's so it's not like I am in pain or having a mini-flare, I feel physically as well as anyone else walking around without Crohn's right now (knock on wood). But I just get flooded with emotion sometimes out of the blue and the tears start and I get weepy. For no reason that I can pinpoint.

I did start seeing a therapist and she did say all the things (job, money, stress etc etc) could be contributing to these mini-soap-opera-episodes but it seems to me that most people I know don't just cry for no reason. I have sat in a coffee shop with tears streaming down my face and didn't really care that anyone saw me. I know THAT is not normal. People are probably like, oh poor girl, obviously not well in the head. :)

Thank you everyone so much for your input and kind words, I have actually been feeling better the last few days. I am thankful I have a place here to get such good feedback. :)