Bad gas fairy

My diet is so limited. If I eat anything my guts don't like poof here comes the gas fairy and she smells absolutely awful. Hard to feel pretty when you smell worse than rotten eggs. Sometimes I can't even figure out what I ate that was wrong, even though I only eat about three things. Pfft! here I go again, excuse me!

OK...now I am jealous!  I can't fart and want to!!!!!  ps the gas fairy drives a beat up old truck with bad exhaust and his wand is made of stinky sausage!  I know because he parks in my driveway! 

Question---if you leave a lost tooth for the tooth fairy, what do you leave under your pillow for the gas fairy?????

Hahahahaha...at least we can clear a room out when we want...great way to get rid of unwanted guests.