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Crohn's and no sex drive

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Crohn's Disease
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Posted 12/18/2012 12:53 PM (GMT 0)
I've read a few other older threads on this topic, but didn't see anyone on 6mp with these issues. I am 30 years old and have zero sex drive. It has nothing to do with my "body image" as some suggest on other sites, but rather I'm always tired, don't feel well or don't feel like sex is on the table after I've had diarrhea all day long. Not to mention, when my husband and I do have sex, it hurts! Before I had Crohn's, I was all over him, but now it's physically uncomfortable. I've talked to my GI dr and gyno about this without much luck on the subject. Especially for the ladies, does Crohn's affect your area? My dr did say that inflammation can cause it to be uncomfortable, she guessed.

I'm wondering what your experiences are with this? I am so frustrated with not being able to be there 100% for my husband! Thanks!
Posted 12/18/2012 1:06 PM (GMT 0)
I feel the exact same as you. My husband jokes that he bought the 'big box' of condoms (12) and that should last us the year. I have a very patient husband and he understands how I feel when I am feeling crummy. I know that it is hard to make yourself do something when it hurts or you are afraid of pooping all over them. I have found that we make physical contact in other ways like snuggling on the couch or holding hands when we walk just to be together physically. I sometimes force myself to be 'in the mood' just so that he gets some contact. I hope that your husband is as understanding as mine is.
Posted 12/18/2012 2:09 PM (GMT 0)
I have a recto-vaginal fistula that currently has a draining seton, so I know what you mean about it hurting. I take tylenol an hour before sometimes if we're planning something; that helps a bit. We were married a year ago, and we waited until we were married, so I'm amazed at how patient and understanding my husband has been at times where I'm not able to or not in the mood. He's also pretty good at working hard at helping get me in the mood; cuddling, flowers, etc. Like @colitiscanuck, I will force myself anyway when I'm not in the mood because I feel bad saying no all the time. It's really hard, I'm sorry you're going through this.

On another note, if you're having inflammation that means that the Crohn's isn't as controlled as it should be. Maybe you should have more/different maintenance meds?
Posted 12/18/2012 6:13 PM (GMT 0)
I am now 40 and didn't have a sex drive for a year and a half.  I just never felt in the mood and felt "dirty" down there and just uncomfortable.  I also have a r/v fistula and sometimes it was painful.  I now have a draining seton and my Crohn's is more under control and I finally got my sex drive back.  Hang in there!
Posted 12/19/2012 6:55 AM (GMT 0)
I'm having lots of issues too. I'm just so tired! I tell my husband that I can't even explain how tired I am. It's like pure exhaustion! I'm also very sensitive down there right now because I go to the bathroom 5-7 times a day. I just feel yucky and tired.
Posted 12/19/2012 9:18 PM (GMT 0)
And you are married!!imagine me being a 27 years old female, who was really good looking not to have sex over 2 years....
I feel tired all the time, last time I tried, I was not even close to a remission, so I know the pain you are talking about. I is tottally uncorfatable, besides, after the sex, the bady is relaxed so...bathroom time!!not too romantic to have diarea and come back to a romantic hugging on the bed. Not romantic at all!I dont even have to mention the smeel if he desides to go to the bathroom after you.
I think of it as a karma I have to carry for an especific amount of time, something my spirit needs to become betther. But I is a lot more dificult to fell good if you are not getting any. I suggest as you are married, to try to make unnespected quickies...not to make it always on the bed, and not only on the evenings. Could make your husband very happy, you can be happy...and no need to be so romantic, so you can use the toilet or feel your pain afterwords.
good to see I am not the only one.
Posted 12/20/2012 5:51 PM (GMT 0)
I am mid 40s and have the same lack of drive issues. I know that some of mine is the exhaustion, some is the poopiness worry sometimes. However, I dont take the meds you take. But, I recently learned that BC pills can often cause a lack of drive. I also found I had more dirve when I upped the amount of Vitamin D I was taking. The last thing my older sis told me-as we age we tend toward dryness vaginally---you are likely too young to have this issue, but dehydration may cause it for you. For those that have a fistual you might not be able to use it, but I am going to try one of the marketed moisturizers -maybe even one that has the kick to it.
I am lucky with a patient hubby and I tell him that I recognize his patience as much as I can.
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