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Ridiculous reply from a teacher. Need input.

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Posted 9/29/2009 12:23 PM (GMT 0)
Well Fitzy I think I did show compassion from my own practices as a college instructor. My core suggestion is very workable -- see if there is another section of the same course to transfer into. And my second core observation was not directed at anyone -- it was just that sometimes things cannot be solved. Nor did I mention anyone feeling "entitled." I simply mentioned the unfortunate reality that some students do try to game the system, and it is not always simple for a teacher to know who is and who really deserves assistance. I realize this is a tough dilemma, and there are a lot of good suggestions on this thread.

Posted 9/29/2009 2:33 PM (GMT 0)
I just wanted to add that my parents were told they would never be able to conceive. 3 years after adopting my sister, they conceived me. They were told I would be born dead. I was on birth control for years, but call our first daughter our happy surprise, so accidents and miracles happen in the baby department.

How did you make out with the Disability Dept? Have they been any help?
Posted 9/29/2009 2:39 PM (GMT 0)
What about taking a incomplete and figuring out something with this instructor? There is also medical withdrawl (see about taking an 8 week or an intersession course to replace it) if you talk with the dean before the end of the semester.
Do you mind if I ask what course is this?

Sweetie, I think what C2 is trying to say is if you really feel too bad to go to class doesn't that mean you feel too bad to be having sex?
I also remember what it was like to be in my 20's and I have to admit yeah I did with a broken leg. So I would highly suggest that you not include that in your issues when you approach your academic instructors.

Another question will you lose your scholarship if you get a "C"? Or is it based off of your overall GPA?
I have to admit in my undergrad I have 2 courses that were D is for diploma.

Another question would be possible to find mix media adeptation for this class?
Posted 9/29/2009 2:49 PM (GMT 0)
I'm sorry. I come from a previous generation. To me it is irresponsible to risk pregnancy when you are not married and are unable to support yourself AND a child and risking the opportunity of an educational scholarship someone else might have been less willing to risk losing. As my parents always told me: "the world does NOT owe you a living".

However, you do especially have my sympathy in regard to the perpetual nausea. To this day I VIVIDLY remember being nauseated 24 hours a day, seven days a week, for two and one half years prior to my obstruction and resection. I remember that I had pain, I remember bloating up like I was 11 months pregnant w/twins. But I just remember I had them. The nausea, on the other hand, I REMEMBER, VIVIDLY and to this day nausea can drive me to tears in no time.
Posted 9/29/2009 5:55 PM (GMT 0)
All right, I have taken everyone's posts into consideration, and I really do appreciate them.
I have not gone to the OoD yet, but I think I want to see where my grade stands as I do my best in the class. It will be a fairer judgment than on whether there is any unfairness/bias in grading. I can tell early on as we have a writing assignment do, and I've never made below a B. I love to write...and I don't want to put this teacher in an uncomfortable position either. I believe she and I can work things out, and that her treatment and grading within the next few weeks can be a good indicator to go by. We both need to give each other a chance.

As for sex, we haven't in about a month and a half because problems started literally the day after. I just don't do it when I'm feeling like this, but I was feeling better before for a while.
Crohnie2-I understand your beliefs on this subject are different and I respect them, but I was raised in a pretty liberal-minded family so I do make a different decision..

On the bright side, my cysts are not hurting as much, and I managed to get a meal down last night that. I'm still going in to the doctor to see what we can do. I thought I was well before too and then this happened. I hope this is a lesson learned.

As for the grade itself, it's based off of GPA. I am doing pretty well in my other classes (100+s I hope I keep this up...) so if I made a C it would probably be okay. I know I can do a lot better than a C though. The class is American Literature, but it's a lot more work than your average literature class. I didn't take it to be easy, however. I was curious.

Anyway, I'll see how it goes within the next couple of weeks with grading and what the doctors say. If it doesn't look to be in my favor then something will be done, but I don't want to 'jump the gun' either. There is a lot of great advice in here, and I will be using it! Thank you guys!
Posted 9/29/2009 7:23 PM (GMT 0)
::butting in from the UC forum::
Have you bought a home pregnancy test? If it's been a month and a half since you last had sex, it would for sure be accurate enough by this point to tell you if you're pregnant or not. All you have to do is pee on a stick and you'll have a pretty darn good idea.
Posted 9/29/2009 7:42 PM (GMT 0)
Yes, I did, but it was not a very good test so the answer could be either way. I need to go out and get another today. I'm really hoping that it's just the cysts...
Posted 9/29/2009 8:14 PM (GMT 0)
First Response tests are generally regarded (on the pregnancy boards I used to frequent) as being highly accurate.
Posted 9/29/2009 9:15 PM (GMT 0)
Honey just go to student health center and get a REAL prego test. It should only cost about 20 bucks.
Posted 9/29/2009 9:37 PM (GMT 0)
I just found out we get them free on campus! I'll be going there this week for sure. The only reason I haven't bought any more is because money is tight :/ I'm glad I can even refill my medicine!
Posted 9/29/2009 10:27 PM (GMT 0)
I'll be checking in on you...this post has caught my attention for some reason. At any rate, I hope the test is negative, because you definitely don't need that to think about on top of everything else.
Posted 9/29/2009 11:50 PM (GMT 0)
Ditto to fruit girl. Mike, I'm sorry if I jumped down your throat. Without getting this thread off topic the word *entitled* (whoever said it) struck a nerve with me. It is the latest buzz word to strike down any social program. I was raised believing in a greater common good and helping man kind. I am extremely liberal politically and I get sickened when I hear good people that could use a little help referred to as entitled, as if they chose their situation and are happy sitting around languishing in it. I know there are those that take advantage of every system. But having worked in many, I would say those that are greatful and deserving far out weigh the so called "entitled." My biggest peeve is when people refer to the disabled as entitled, as if they chose their situation. Most would rather work and earn a much bigger paycheck than their measley disability stipend. And frankly if I ever become disabled I WOULD feel entitled to the money as I would have paid into the system all those years. Nothing wrong w/ a safety net in my book.
Posted 9/30/2009 1:05 AM (GMT 0)
C2 - I am not sure that it is fair or helpful to question the morality or otherwise of LMills' decisions when she has come here for help. I would prefer it if this could be a safe place...

LMills, I'm new to this discussion, but wanted to add that there is a recognised phenomenon in feminist circles of women kicking away the ladder once they have climbed it, and therefore preventing other women from reaching the same heights. I wonder if you are encountering this phenomenon at the moment - in other words "I got here on my own merits and without any help; why should I help other people? It's better for them to have to climb the ladder by themselves". On top of this, you have the problem that she has AI issues herself: once again you may be dealing with a woman who is kicking the ladder to stop you from climbing it. Remember, the successful sick can be less, rather than more, tolerant of their struggling underlings.

Sorry you're dealing with this.

I.
Posted 9/30/2009 1:24 AM (GMT 0)
I really hope what I'm about to say doesn't come off as harsh, but I am a very blunt and honest person, so I apologize in advance if I tick anyone off. I understand that you have a scholarship that you don't want to lose, but your health should be your first priority.  In your own blog you state that emotional stress is a HUGE trigger for flares and such....and it seems like school alone is enough to stress you out at this point, and ontop of that you are worried about possibly being pregnant.  Unfortunatly teachers can basically make their own rules for their classroom within reason, and that is just life -- and life isn't fair.  I personally have never expected anyone to make me an exception and change their rules for me....to me that IS letting this disease beat me.  You said that you are only taking this class and fighting it to show that this disease won't beat you....but you are litterally making yourself sick over this.  You need to swallow your pride and take care of yourself.  It kinda rubbed me the wrong way when you said you come from a liberal family so you made the choice to have sex and whatnot before marriage....thats perfectly fine in my book BUT when you have a disease that could kill you or your baby during pregancy how selfish of you at this point in your life to take that risk, you are in no position right now to raise a child, or even have one (when you are married and financially stable then ok).  I understand that sex is a huge part in a relationship...I get that, so if you are going to have sex you should be using condoms, and at least one other form of birth control, ideally 3 forms of birth control.    You have a long life ahead of you, and a truly hope everything works out, I admire you for taking on so much with school and a relationship and everything else, but please do not make yourself sick to prove points.  There is only one you, take care of yourself.

Again I apologize if I came off rude, I know you didn't tell us your situation to be lectured,  I'm basically the same age as you (22), so I can completely feel for you and your situation, and everything I wrote above is what I would want someone to say to me...or what I would say to myself if in your situation.

Posted 9/30/2009 2:09 AM (GMT 0)
I have some wee suggestions... mulitpule forms of birth control (including no glove, no love). Stop freaking out of over little things like grades, when it is not really risking your scholarship. Especially in the face of having surgery or having a baby. Actually get a prego test asap from student health.

I think we have exhausted the subject, so please no more posts.
Posted 9/30/2009 4:35 AM (GMT 0)
LMills, I've emailed you.
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