Good one, AG.
We have adjacent bathrooms w/the toilets back to back. Occasionally hubby and I hit the thrones at the same time. Once in a while, I"ll knock, knock on the wall to tell hubby I hope everything comes out all right and he will respond w/"Here I sit broken hearted. Paid a nickle to poop and only farted."
NANNERS! I LOVE your desired epitaph!!!!
Its a tie between Sniper, Nanners and AG!