Did you have kids AFTER knowing you had crohns?

I saw that. It made me sorta wonder too.

Oh boy.... I already had my kids before I got sick. They were grown and out of the house...

If I had known... I don't think I would have had any children. My siblings said If I were the oldest child rather than the youngest... And they saw what they are seeing... They said they probably would not have had children.

As it is... My whole family is walking on eggshells and hoping they don't get this disease. But the good thing is that since I have been pretty open about my journey... They are all very careful and have all had an early colonoscopy and they take their concerns to the doctor right away. Another plus--even though they know it can be bad they also know you get to choose how you are impacted to some degree. If you have a defeated attitude prepare to be defeated.... Put on your big girl/boy panties and keep moving forward and you'll fare much better. You gotta be a fighter.

But that's just me. Others might make a different decision.

Clo

When I first got diagnosed 16 years ago, my disease was very aggressive: unbearable pain, non-stop diarrhea, weight loss and fatigue all the time. However, all my colonoscopies came out clean then and I was not eligible to getting biologics. I was sick all the time and couldn’t start a family. Nine years later, I developed my first perianal fistula and took Remicade.
I brought up my nephew whom I consider to be my son. He is a young gentleman now. When I think back, it’s my mum and sisters who brought him up with me. I couldn’t have been able to do this alone as I was sick all the time.
Also, my niece has celiac disease and my nephew (son) keeps complaining of digestive problems. My aunt had UC and had a stoma. So yes digestive autoimmune diseases are running in my family and yes thank God I didn’t have children as I didn’t want them to suffer as I did and still do.

Heck no! It was an easy decision - in fact it was made for me given that I've lived in hospitals/bathroom since I was a teenager...and it got miles worse than anything imaginable since the whole fistula evilness. No income, family support, unable to make/keep friendships....I wouldn't have been available to raise a kid and they'd only be exposed to my tremendous trauma. Best decision I ever made.

After I was diagnosed of Crohn's, I had a productive life. I got married, had a kid, hold onto a job and traveled to Disney World, Universal Studio, etc. for family vacations. This year I had multiple setbacks, which could be stress related. But for a young person reading this, this is not a completely hopeless disease.

Randy,

Once family members see someone with severe disease.... not only the person with the diagnosis but other family members may change their minds about having kids.

My daughter already had 2 children when I was diagnosed. She did not have a 3rd child.... My son has decided he is never having children.... And two niece's have decided not to risk it.

This dreaded disease affects so many people in our families in ways that we sometimes don't realize.

Clo

Lab,

Thanks for sharing!

I think it's just different for everyone....

And my answer is not really a fair answer because I already had grown children prior to the development the disease later in life.... And it was and still is a severe case...

When I think of not having had my children my heart actually hurts. I can't imagine a life without them.

So I totally understand someone wanting to and then having children... Plus there are so many variables. No one knows what's going to happen in the future.

Clo

I found out I had Crohn's my senior year of college.
I went through 2+ years of hell, then Remicade helped.
Another 7-ish years of denial and rollercoaster symptoms until I was almost dead and got my ileostomy.
Having my colon removed allowed me to live again.
Basically zero Crohn's activity for me since surgery, 13+ years ago now.
I've had 2 healthy pregnancies with 2 healthy babies.
Do I worry they will get sick? Of course.
But do I also raise them to be conscious of their mental and physical health? Absolutely.
There are genetic factors that maybe I cannot negate, but I always wonder if maybe I wasn't a stressed out senior in college, smoking camels, and eating ramen noodles every day, MAYBE I wouldn't have triggered that gene. The truth is, no one really knows yet.
I do no regret having kids, but I do wish I had been better prepared for the challenges.
And there is no way I could be doing as well as I am if it weren't for the unfaltering support of my husband and family.
Every person is different. Every support network is different.
This is a serious question, and I 100% respect those of us who decided not to reproduce.
I'm just one of the ones that took a chance.
To be honest, I think part of me thought I was going to die for so long that I wanted my husband to have kids so that he wouldn't be alone when I died. That's the kind of morbid mind-tunnels this disease can send us down.
But now I'm 42 and still don't know what I want to be when I grow up because I never expected to make it this far! Let alone be raising two other humans.
Life is crazy. But it can be amazing.
And I think if you do the inner-work - every Crohnie will know if kids are right for them, or NOT.

I had already had my 7 children before I was diagnosed with crohns. My youngest was 5 when I was diagnosed. So far only 1 was diagnosed as a baby with gastroperisis. And my 21 yr old son keeps having stomach issues. He has a gi appt scheduled but it's months away.

We are in US north carolins. 1st appts always far out scheduled. I currently have a dermatology that the soonest appt is July 2024

I found out I had Crohn's the year before I got married. I just had my 4th kid earlier this year in January. I would do it all again in a heartbeat.

^So you're disregarding all the genetic studies that have found over 150 gene mutations that increase susceptibility to developing Crohn's disease?

The studies showing that for monozygotic/identical twins if one gets it, the odds of the other getting it are much higher than with dizygotic/non-identical twins?

Granted, genes alone don't come close to explaining why anybody gets it. Genetics seems to account for only a small portion of why.

But they are definitely a part of it.

Pop, I would say that to ignore the genetic aspect is a bit of denial. Not only in studies but in families multiple members have cd/uc sometimes both. In my family's case, myself, my cousin and maternal g' pa had cd. My mom had similar symptoms but was not diagnosed. Ashke**** Jews carry the disease whether through in breeding or other factors ,so it has been established that there is a tendency to run in family groups. Now what triggers the disease is what I would like to know. Environmental, bacteria, virus, allergy?