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Feeling numb/emotionless

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Posted 1/17/2008 5:47 PM (GMT 0)
Hello all. I'm new to this particular board, but not to HW. I came over from Ulcerative Colitis with a stop-over in A/P.

I recently (as in, this week) experienced the break up of my 3.5 year relationship. We'd been having problems for a while and fought fairly often. Normally, these frustrations would cause me cry - often and profusely. Since the break up, however, I've hardly cried at all (like, a few tears down my cheek). I feel like I can't cry. Even my ex is surprised.

I recently increased the dosage of my SSRI. Could the med be dulling my emotional experience? Or am I just so overwhelmed by emotions that I've shut off that part of my brain? I'm worried that I won't be able to move on/heal unless I fully engage my emotions around this.

Any thoughts?

Posted 1/17/2008 6:44 PM (GMT 0)
Birunji, Welcome to the depression forum.

The only thing that I can suggest is to try moving on and go from there. Maybe the medications are stifiling your emotions, but I think if that were the case, that you wouldn't question it. Maybe there is a part of you that is relieved that you are not fighting anymore. Or maybe you have cried and grieved enough throughout your relationship. And then again maybe it really hasn't sunk in yet. Either way you have come to the right place. There are many here that can help you through this transition period in your life. I hope that these suggestions help you some, though you have probably gone over this already in your own mind.

Good luck to you,

hugs,

Karen
Posted 1/17/2008 7:00 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks Karen. It may well be a mix of denial/avoidance and exhaustion/relief. Only time will tell, I suppose...
Posted 1/17/2008 11:30 PM (GMT 0)

Hi Erin,
It might help to know which SSRI you are on and at what dose?  Any other meds? Yes, the meds can blunt your feelings, however, each person is different and reacts differently to the meds.

I agree, perhaps you are relieved this relationship has come to an end. Please keep posting as the members of this forum know where your coming from and what you are going through.

Posted 1/18/2008 4:24 AM (GMT 0)
My med info should be in my signature. Please let me know if it isn't showing up properly.

Thanks!
Posted 1/18/2008 4:47 AM (GMT 0)
Birunji, in the past when I ended a bad relationship, no matter how sad it was while it was going on, I felt releaved and distant when it was over. Some part of me never put those feelings away though.

So I'd say engage it head on.
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