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Posted 3/27/2008 10:01 PM (GMT 0)
I want to tell you guys something, I told my teacher today(the one I always talk too)... she knew because I talked about feelings but she didnt know what it was. I finally lost it today... when I got to her class(its just she and I) I sat in the floor and rocked the whole time. I was so stressed out and I just wanted to breakdown and cry so bad. I ttook a lot to hold that in, but I did. I have her twice a day so the 2nd time (which is my last class of the day) I sat in the floor and rocked again. (Rocking has a soothing affect on me)

about 15 minutes before school was out I told her I really wanted to talk to my counselor bu tI could do it. She talked to me and said she would help. She said tomorrow she owuld walk me herself. And if I wanted to I could tell her in one word. I had to tell her, I typed "r**e" in my calculator and gave it to her. I was so scared, more than ever. We agreed we would tlak about it tomorrow. I have been uneasy and shaking all day long and I just have a strange feeling about something. I have been quiet and sleeping. I am in a total shock, I cant believe I told her.

I had a 4.0 until I took Latin I! It went down to a 3.85... which rounds up to 3.9... which bugs me. It should be 4.0! But, Im trying and thats the best I can do. I am just to stressed to do anything more. I pulled an all nighter last night to finish an English project... then today I realized I had 4 books open on my desk (Chemistry, AP Psych, Anatomy, and my notebook)... WOW. I looked at all of it and all the papers and I realized how much work I do all the time. I am always working. People constantly tell me how I never do anything because I am always working and studying, but I cant help it, which just made me think of something that happened today....

I was in Chem lab and my friend drew a data table, the lines werent straight and I am a perfectionist... they knew it bothered me! I have to draw them neat and perfectly straight... So, my friend says, "Oh well, it isnt going to be perfect, you aren't perfect." I was stunned actually. Because then my other friend was like, "OH my goodness! You did not just tell her that. I would take it back if I were you."

So, see. I dont think Im perfect. But I unconsciously try to be. I do everything as best as possible. So, it didnt hurt me that she told me I wasnt perfect, it hurt when they joke because they think I think I am perfect, and I dont. But, it totally puts so much pressure on me. When people tell me what a great job I am doing, I hate that, because it puts pressure on me to do even better than that. I dont do it on purpose, its just like that in my head...

So, today has been a very long, sad, anxious, strange day. I am still in shock and I dont know what to do now. I am completely blank. I have 0 emotion right now and so Im just sitting here, my brain shut down!

Thanks so much you guys for being here for me. Thank you. It makes me feel better that you guys listen.
Posted 3/27/2008 11:13 PM (GMT 0)
Tennis,
I am so proud of you. I remember the first time I wrote a letter to one of my teachers about something scary I was scared to death to see her again the next day. Sweating, shaking etc...know that you are ok. Its totally ok to be nervous and scared. I am so glad you did it.
I am so happy that your teacher is supporting you and is going to walk you there, what an awesome teacher.

You can do this....if your scared, shaky etc....you go anyways....you have already taken that big step...Its time to talk about it...if you can't go into detail thats fine.....they won't push it....just do what you can...

By the way, I am called a perfectionist too, though I was much worse when I was younger....I would know if someone walked in my room
or moved anything in it the slightest bit...suppose you could say I used to be obsessive....now I don't have as much time...but I still keep things nice and neat.
When I do a school paper, In my mind I would rather not pass it in than to pass one in that I did not spend a great amount of time on..So I'd spend so much time on my work....still do....this week I have been swamped and stressed by it all...sometimes it makes me want to quite but I dont:)
I am in school for nursing...now in clinicals...and the class load is huge. I am in school on mondays from 8 am till 8:40 pm...thats my longest day. I have class 4 days a week. I also work one full day and one part time day. I have not got out much either but boy do I need too:)

I'm with ya in spirit....so very proud of you
Pressing
Posted 3/27/2008 11:51 PM (GMT 0)
Pressing and Tennis,

I just had to pop in and say that I am so proud of both of you. And I love the way that you support eachother. That is what this is all about.

I also know what you both are going through, and I know that it isn't easy.

Keep up the good work

luv and hugs,
Karen
Posted 3/28/2008 2:34 PM (GMT 0)
Thank you Karen, I also appreciate your continued support.
I know there will be days when I need it more than ever. Glad to have found this board.
Pressing
Posted 3/28/2008 8:38 PM (GMT 0)

Hi there,

I am so happy that you both feel comfortable enough here to open up and share your feelings and experiences.  I know how much it helps to be able to release that and the weight that it takes off.  This is a wonderful forum and the people are so great.

I must say that the sun is shining here today melting some of that snow.  Go away snow.  I need to get out and walk so badly.  I think that I will think of some excuse to get me outside today for a little while.  I love when I can post that I feel good.

Have a wonderful day

hugs, Karen

Posted 3/29/2008 12:46 AM (GMT 0)
*sigh* I felt a bit better today... after I rocked back and forth in class yesterday and had a rough day, I fell asleep on the bus. And I got in bed when I got home. I slept until this morning! Sleep helped a bit...

I didnt really talk to my teacher about what happened, but she asked if I thought it would be ok for her to tell my counselor just as a start so it wouldnt be so awkward for me to tell her, because I will never be able to just go and tell her myself, so I agreed. So, my teacher is going to talk to her some. No idea what she will say. Probably that I have something important to tell her and its about me.... and that she knows it is affecting me pretty bad. She said maybe it would help take some of the shock off.

So, maybe she will get on that Monday morning. I assume my counselor will want to speak with me after she hears it... but I wont tell her unless I am pushed or forced so... I do hope my teacher tells her, I think it will help.

Other than that, I am still really stressed out. My classes are killing me. Spring break isnt for 2 more weeks. Not even sure if I can make it that long. I also have to go to the doctor during spring break. He wants to see how I am doing on my medicine... so...

*sigh* I really just want to go to bed and sleep for a very long time. I want to wake up and all of these feelings be gone. I dont want to be stressed or worried or anxious or depressed or anything else. I hate feeling so overwhelmed and not being able to do anything about it...

I think I am going to go to bed early again... all I want to do is sleep... Thanks and hope you guys have a great weekend!
Posted 3/29/2008 12:57 AM (GMT 0)

Hi Tennis,

I understand how you feel.  Sleeping can be like an escape when you are under so much stress.  I think when I get depressed, all I want to do is sleep.  It does help to take your mind off of things, but sometimes staying busy does that too. 

I am so happy that you are going to talk to your counselor.  I think that this will really help you.  You can get it off of your shoulders and I think that the release will be good for you.  Then hopefully you can get back on with your life.  Studying and doing things with your friends.  You need to have people to talk to.

So keep up the great work.  I hope that you have a good weekend also.

Luv and hugs, Karen

Posted 3/29/2008 1:04 AM (GMT 0)
Tennis,
Sorry you feel so down but that is to be expected after what you have been through.
I hope you are able to see your counselor on monday. I really think you should, even if you only talk about other things at this time.
I am glad that your teacher has volunteered to help you out with that, must be a great teacher.

about feeling crappy, I know how you feel. I am not on meds but sometimes I think of taking them, I just don't know what the side effects would do at this point and since I am working with patients now I don't want to risk anything.
I was on spring break this week and all I did all week was schoolwork. I wanted to complete it but didn't get done. Still have a 5 page psychology paper I am working on, its killing me , I have no motivation whatsoever to do it, it is so unlike me. I guess I am just in a funk at this point.
We will get through it, it may take time, but we will
You just hang in there, keep going.
I am planning on only taking one class this summer to give my self a break. I have a year and a half left....the next year I will be taking classes summer , winter, spring and fall. Thats the way the program is set up so I have alot coming my way.

Maybe next semester you can lighten your load a little if your still having a hard time, sometimes we have to do that.
Have a really good weekend. I Will be thinking of you
Pressing
Posted 3/29/2008 1:12 AM (GMT 0)
Yea, but sleep can sometimes be bad! But, at this point I dont think I am worried about it being bad, I just want to sleep! =] I have been getting on average 6 hours a night for the past month or so.... I have no idea why. I did have myself on a schedule and I went between 8 and 9... it gradually became later somehow! I started having more work and got tired of doing it, but I had to get it done so... Plus, I realized that my medicine allows me to get less sleep and not get sick from it, which used to be the consequence for not getting enough sleep. Enough for me used to be like 9-10 hrs (on a school night) and like 16 on a non-school night!! Now I can get 5-7 on a school night and not get sick like I used to... ewww it was awful so I am glad for that.... however, now I get no sleep because I stay up so much doing work. I pulled an all nighter the other night doing work..

So, between not sleeping lately and all of the stress from school, emotional stress, physical stress, and mental stress, I am about ready to fall out... I just cant take it anymore. I just feel really tired and worn-out and sick-like. I cant handle it for much longer....

Plus, its not easy trying to hang on and not let myself have a full breakdown and crumb to pieces. (thats how I feel!)

I will TRY talking to my counselor, after my teacher does of course. I dont know how it will work out... I have told several people and it feels good, but it hasnt really helped. Its worrying me because I am afraid that I wont be able to get rid of it and move on with life. With it and everything I else I am still going through, "getting on with life" doesnt seem likely! I still havent gotten back to doing things with friends, even after 10 1/2 months now... Although, on the studying, everyone tells me I do that way to much so! I have gotten on with that! It never slowed down, I just grew to hate it even more!

Hope that snow melts soon!
Posted 3/29/2008 1:17 AM (GMT 0)
I have a bunch of Psych work myself. I am really behind. I have 9 out of 10 papers still to write! I used to enjoy Psych, but not since I started this class... I hate it. Its AP and a college class so it goes super fast, its super hard, and I am in no interest to do any of it! I have about 10 quizzes still just to catch up! I am pressured because I know I have to get done. And I know when I get done I have to have a good grade! So...

*sigh* ughhh.... I need to sleep or something, before I have a total mental breakdown. I just want to cry so bad. ughh.... :(
Posted 3/29/2008 2:46 AM (GMT 0)
Tennis,
Cry all you want, I wish I could at this point my tears wont fall.
I usually only get 5-6 hours of sleep a night. So my therapist tells me I really need to be getting more sleep. Its not like I nap during the day or anything, I stay pretty busy, but my energy and motivation are lacking.
Since I had spring break this week, I went to bed about 12 and got up around 8 each morning, so I did pretty good with my sleep this week.
I have always been a late nighter, for no reason inparticular I just always find something to meddle with, cleaning etc..

For clinicals I have to be at the hospital 2 days a week at 6:30 am, so I have to leave my house at 5:30 am, thats the hardest, I am so not a morning person:) 7 more weeks of that, then I will have a summer break.

Your need to sleep is part of your depression. It makes you really tired, and withdrawn, which is why you don't feel like hanging with friends. I am feeling the same way at this point. My family lives only about 30 minutes from me and I hardly visit anymore, guess I just don't feel like socializing.

I really hope you speak with your counselor some more. Find out whats really going on and ways to manage it.
Don't worry about getting rid of it so quickly, its going to take time. I want to rush mine too...like I have time to deal with this right now...but there is no way around it....have to take it as it comes.

about your papers, I am so tempted to not even turn one of mine in, and I have never done that before , I am so frustrated with my lack of motivation and lack of caring about it at this point. I will probably hand in this really crappy paper and I hate that.

What I have learned that helps is to not look at the whole picture of work, just take one paper and get that done first, without looking at all that you need to do. Sometimes just getting one done helps to motivate you for another. Looking at the whole load is too overwhelming which is what I did to myself this week.

Just keep going, you can do it (Keep "Pressing" on) hence is where I got my name from
Pressing
Posted 3/29/2008 3:37 AM (GMT 0)
I actually tried crying yesterday... I actually couldnt. Normally I can cry when I snap my fingers, I can even make myself cry, but I couldnt cry yesterday... it was weird.

I dont eve rnap during the day and I stay busy with school and work and everything so normally I am so ready to get in bed, but it keeps getting later and later. I used to stay up all night when I was little. I loved playing outside, would have lived outside had my parents allowed it! But, I have always liked night more. I dont know why, but night is quiet and peaceful, most of the time. Daytime is just to bright and everyone is always running around and everything, it drives me crazy. Personally, I love the nighttime. And I absolutely hate morning! No way am I a morning person!

Oh yea! Trust me, I understand the sleep thing. My depression (seems) better than it was. It was horrible when it started, 10 1/2 months ago. It was during the summer. I slept all day and got up at night and stayed up til early morning and went back to bed. I never did anything. I didnt want to. It was really hard and I hated it. My worst fear was that it would get worse...it did. I think I have pretty much been to the other side and back! (well, almost back...not quite there yet!) Maybe it doesnt seem so obvious to me now since its been such a long time so thats why it doesnt seem worse. Although, I do know that it is still bad, no matter how much I try to convince myself that its not bad at all. But, I can look back and there are times when it was worse. I havent had a panic attack in about a month or so... thats good. Some very bad things have happened these past months though so... I felt like I was coming out of it a bit for a few weeks in the beginning of Dec... but I fell back into it quickly.

After that, I realized something very personal, some people here know, and a short time ago I also brought this out of my past so, I have still been dealing with more than I should normally be. And its alot more when I think about it... I guess it has just been so long since I have been me that this seems normal for me now...

When I started going to my counselor about 8 months ago, I wrote her a note about the panic attack I had had and the depression I was going through. Thats why I went to her in the first place. I went once a week every week until around Nov... I slowly stopped going because I felt she wasnt helping me. I was really discouraged because I have such a hard time talking to her that I never really did talk about it to her... One time she actually asked why I kept coming back, she knew something was wrong, and there was something wrong because I had been trying to tell her something. I didnt know how to react when she asked me that. She was trying to help and I wasnt able to talk to her. I wasnt able to let her in for some reason. I felt like she was getting a bit frustrated with it. Or me. Or that I wouldnt talk about it. I dont know.

I have never had to talk about anything. And never had anyone to talk too. Nor has anyone ever told me I could talk to them, at least not until recently. Its a new thing to me and its very hard. I am not used to being close to people and letting them in. I know that sounds weird, but its how it has always been for me so... its just really hard. And I hate it. I wish it were different. I wish I could be open. It would be so much easier. I just cant understand it. I want help so bad. I want to talk so bad. So, why cant I? Im not sure, its a question I ask myself often and have yet to answer.

I have gotten a bit better at talking. (I was able to tell my teacher!) I have huge trust issues also. I dont trust people alot. And it takes a very long time for me to be able to so...thats another thing. But, I have been working on it. Im trying very hard.
Posted 3/29/2008 6:01 AM (GMT 0)
Tennis
You dont trust people because of what you have been through. I am the same way, It takes me a long time to trust people. I have had many relationships but as soon as they get close I push them away. I once was engaged knew the person for 5 years and called the wedding off one month before the big day. I freaked, didnt want him to know the real me, or even worse thinking that he was going to change into some one who was not nice or who would be abusive. Strange thing is he was never like that, never talked down to me, never fought with me, he was really sweet. It was due to my own fears from my past expereinces.

I hope in time this will end, that I will be normal so to speak....as of now I can't see that. My counselor keeps saying I will, give it time. I am beginning to trust her. Dont worry about not being able to talk lots of people who were sexually abused find it very hard to do . We are all so different and do things on very different levels and your counselor knows that. I really hope you get the courage to tell her. It will be helpful to have someone who can talk you through it.
Please don't ever worry about feeling differently etc....its completely understandable.

Can you do me a favor, If your interested. I just found this great site for sexually abused girls, with a forum board like this and chat rooms. I'd love you to take a look at it and see what you think. If your up for it.
Just click on my name and send me and email at that email address posted and I will send you a site to the link. I really think it will be helpful, I was chatting. I just joined this week and was chatting with them tonight it was great. You'd be amazed to see how the abuse affects different people.

Enjoy your day
Pressing
Posted 3/29/2008 3:56 PM (GMT 0)
Yea, its understandable. But also, I cant remember a time where I had to trust someone enough to tell them something (like this) that had happened to me. (not until recently anyways)... I trust my teacher probably more than anyone else. Its hard for me to tell her things, but I know that I can and nothing will happen if I do. I feel like I know her alot and its the opposite with my counselor. She's a nice person and all, but there is just something about her. She's kind of intimidating. She makes me feel like she really doesnt understand, like I need to draw her a picture or something. I like her and I want to talk to her, but I just havent gotten there yet.

On the other hand, its different with my teacher. She is very understanding and shes a great person. Shes cares about things alot and shes a great listener. She doesnt force me to say things or anything, she just lets me do it on my own when I am ready. I have known her since the beginning of school, but we have talked about ALOT of things and so I feel closer to her. I know her kids and I know how she is with them and that gives me confidence in talking to her about things. I know that she wont overreact and she knows life is just life and things happen. See, my counselor and teacher are like opposites to me!

*sigh* I have work I should be doing so.. I hope everyone is having or is going to have a great weekend!
Posted 3/29/2008 5:42 PM (GMT 0)

Hi Tennis,

I think that it is great that you feel comfortabe enough to be able to talk to your teacher the way that you do.  It is so important to have that type of release.  And I am sure that after talking to her that you will feel so much better.

Give your counselor a chance though.  She could suprise you in the manner of which she approaches this topic.  I hope so anyway.  But if it doesn't work, don't feel bad, there are other counselors that you can talk to.  And there are some good ones out there.  I just think sometimes we just don't always click with all of them.  And you find you are not comfortable with them.  And that is okay too.  You have options now and that is wonderful.

You have a good weekend.  We have sunshine today and it is a little warmer.  We still have a lot of snow on the ground, just waiting for it to leave.

Take care,

hugs, Karen

Posted 3/29/2008 6:41 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks. I have been trying to give her a chance. Basically because I feel like she is the closest I can get at this point to getting help. I know my teacher can help me, but my counselor should know more about it, ya know. So... I have been trying my best to stay with my counselor, although, at times she upsets me because I try so hard to get to her and tell her things, and when it doesnt happen or she doesnt catch on, I get very upset. So, that doesnt help. I really wish I was slightly older though. I hate being this age because I dont like talking to my parents, we arent close at all. So, I feel stuck because I really cant get help without them knowing about everything, and I really dont want them knowing, not now. I want to be independent and be able to get my own help by myself. I would tell my parents, but not at the beginning....

I dont like it. I hate feeling trapped like this. I think thats a problem these days. Teens in particular. I can understand why its such a problem, if they feel anything like I do then they feel like they cant talk about it. I hate that. Its a horrible thing.

Ok, sorry, I get off on other things. Im not feeling so great and I have work to do, but I dont want to do it. I need a huge motivation or something! I really dont even think a motivation to get it done would help... :( Im really not in the mood to do anything, but I cant sit here doing nothing.....
Posted 3/29/2008 7:25 PM (GMT 0)

Hi There Tennis,

It is so hard when you and your counselor don't jive.  I have had a counselor like that.  He would just sit there and wait for me to say something.  I never did go back because I really didn't feel comfortable with him.  Usually they ask questions and that gets a conversation going I think.

Later I went to a therapist that worked strictly with childhood abuse and ptsd.  I really got a lot of help with her.  I seem to like female counselors better than men.  I guess it goes with the abuse though.  I think that it is easier to talk to a woman about things like that.  Do you know what I mean?  I think that you do.

Maybe you should take some time out and do something that you like for a little while.  Then the school work wouldn't seem so stressful.  I know how you feel when you have something that you just have to do but you don't feel like you can do it at the time.  Sometimes just starting helps.  But it sounds like a nice walk or a relaxing bath would be a good change for you.  Just relax for a few and then try again.

The sun is really shining here.  I think that it is going to melt a lot of the snow today.  I sure hope so, it has been such a long winter.  Talk about feeling cooped up.  That gets really depressing after a while.

Tennis, I think that you are doing well.  And I think that Pressing can help you a lot with these things.  I am glad that the two of you met. 

Luv and hugs, Karen

Posted 3/29/2008 10:26 PM (GMT 0)
Thanks for your compliment karen:)
Hope your day went well.

Sorry I didn't get back sooner Tennis, I had to work all day and just got home.
I can understand what you are saying about your counselor. I had felt like that with mine at first too, felt like maybe she was getting frustrated with me because I was not sharing things etc... but I learned those were only my thoughts and that was not the way she felt at all, they know these things take time and mine has been so patient all along.
The biggest thing is they can't read our minds, I mean they have a general idea about how we are feeling from what we have been through but everyone processess things so differently. So she doesn't know exactly how you are feeling, or what is bothering you the most. Sometimes you just have to let it out how is that may be....to give them more direction at meeting your specific needs at this point. She will not judge you, thats not her job, she is there to support you.

As KAren said, if you feel after awhile that you are just not clicking with her please try another counselor. I really do encourage you to share a little more about whats going on....fill her in just a little more, you may be totally surprised at how that will help her to help you.

I am the same way with my parents, we have never been close. I tried talking to my mom about it but she thinks it rediculous that I am going to counseling etc...I won't get into the whole thing, but I know I need to be going at this point in my life.
Perhaps you need to at least try sharing with your mom, even just a little. You may not get the same reaction as my mom and it may be a big help to you. You probabaly feel so alone right now , which is so understandable. I am with ya, I can be with people and feel so alone as if they dont understand me, but they don't know what I am dealing with either.

Like I said the site I just joined this week has been great let me know if your interested.

Hope your day got a little better for you. Mine was just because I was able to get out of the house and get my mind of my problems even if only for the day:
Keep hanging in there Tennis
Pressing
Posted 3/30/2008 9:32 PM (GMT 0)
Karen, I think its impossible for me to relax! I may not do my work and I may be sitting on the computer doing nothing, yet I am still not relaxed. I hardly ever just STOP and quit thinking about things. I am too much of a thinker to slow down, ever. Also, Im not so sure that I am doing well... first because of the thing with my counselor and teacher and talking talking about what happened and stuff... that is really getting to me. And also because of something new. Something I never thought about before, and I havent told anyone about yet either. Its something I am not sure about that is happening to me, but I am kind of afraid to say anything about it. Its a problem I am not so sure what to do about. It can actually turn into something really major, which scares me because I have had a lot of experience with things starting out and growing into a major problem.

I am really not sure what to do. I have mixed feelings because I know it is a bad thing and if it continues it will become a very large issue and it will only get worse, but some part of me feels like it is a good thing. If you all knew what it is I am talking about, last would sound like a bad thing to say. It stupid to think it is a good thing, but it is just how I feel. I am just scared it will continue and become worse. I am not really sure how to tell you guys what it is... but it has been going on for about a week.

*sigh* Im sorry. I have really wanted to vent about it but Im afraid of talking about it. Its totally new and unexpected to me. I never thought it would be me... But, since it hasnt gone on for a while technically it hasnt become a huge issue so...

*sigh* I guess I need some time to think. I really hate to confuse you guys with this. It would be easier if you knew what I am talking about. I just cant get the nerve to say it... Im sorry.

(btw, I did get some work done! thats a plus!)

Take Care
Posted 3/30/2008 10:56 PM (GMT 0)

Tennis,

I really understand about the thinking issue.  I could never turn my mind off.  Every second of every day, I was thinking about something.  That can be so exhausting.  I finally started meditation and eventually I learned to turn my mind off.  So it is possible.  It takes practice though.  Mostly you focus on your breathing.  And it really helps to replennish the mind.  I would think so much that I couldn't pay attention to the things that I was doing at the time.  That isn't healthy for us.  I couldn't learn  because of that.  It really messed me up in school.  It was like I was daydreaming when I should of been paying attention.  And when you learn to meditate, you learn to live in the now. You can focus so much better.  So if I were you I would check it out.  If you want me to I can email you and describe what you need to do.

I feel so bad that you are struggling again.  If you want to talk about it you know that you can email me.  I can understand though if you want to tackle one issue at a time.  But talking might take some of it off of your mind.  So feel free to get ahold of me if you need to.

Take care, I know that you can't right now, but try to relax.  I can help you with that if you want.

Hugs, Karen

Posted 3/30/2008 11:06 PM (GMT 0)
Yea, I have never been able to turn my mind off. I am constantly thinking, which would be ok if I were thinking constructively instead of thinking of all my problems etc. I have a hard time paying attention as well. I have noticed lately at school that while my teachers are talking or something I seem to have my mind some place else. I havent been interested in school much lately, even though I know I have to be.

I will talk about it when I can. Right now, Im trying, but its such a new issue and Im not quite sure how to address it or what it means. I dont know. Talking about things, even more than one thing at a time, helps because then everything isnt bottled up. So, I will be working on it. I wont be able to talk to my teacher about this new thing, technically she would have to report it so, I cant tell her. Plus, I dont want to. To be honest, it seems like something that I am ashamed of... so... I will try.

Thanks, take care.
Posted 3/30/2008 11:18 PM (GMT 0)
Hi Tennis,

If you are interested in the meditation thing, just email me. It really works and helps relax the mind. I would be more than happy to share that with you. Or if you would rather, pick up a book on it. That is how I learned, but like I say I would be more than happy to help you with that. I think that you would benefit greatly from it and it would help you focus on your studies. We don't have to talk about the other thing.

Good luck sweetie,
hugs, Karen
Posted 4/1/2008 8:53 AM (GMT 0)

Hiya Tennis,

I have days where I cannot stop and just think about things as well... sometimes it can run into weeks! lol I think you need to learn some relaxation techniques. There are loads out there, it just depends what suits you. You could try meditation (not the sitting on the floor with your legs crossed going "ohm" version! Thats a stereotype!) or perhaps escapism through something creative like painting?

On the plus side, I am glad tat you have got some work done and that you at least recognise that the thing you cannot talk about is a bad thing and is someting that should not dominate your thoughts.

Remember, we will always be here

Darren

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